


Nobody Knows

by GirlAhgase



Category: GOT7
Genre: Angst and Feels, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Friendship/Love, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-22
Updated: 2021-02-19
Packaged: 2021-03-04 02:13:02
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 23,210
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24865855
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GirlAhgase/pseuds/GirlAhgase
Summary: Jackson and Youngjae struggle with JB and Jinyoung's relationship.The other three members protected Jackson and Youngjae from the excesses of their behaviour when they are on their comeback schedule. Can JB and Jinyoung understand how their behaviour hurts the two most important people in their lives before they escape to China at the end of the comeback.19/02/2021 - Bonus Chapter added.
Relationships: Choi Youngjae/Im Jaebum | JB, Im Jaebum | JB/Park Jinyoung, Kim Yugyeom/Mark Tuan, Park Jinyoung/Jackson Wang
Comments: 32
Kudos: 108





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is inspired by one of my favourite songs. Some of Youngjae's dialogue is an English translation of the songs lyrics.  
> Please go and give the song some love.

He watched them closely, it was worse this comeback. He had survived the last one, he was sure he could survive this one. He closed his eyes to block out the cuddle taking place in front of him, when he watched him go to wrap his arms around the other man he decided he had tortured himself enough and just allowed himself the darkness of the inside of his own eyelids. He heard his name called and a gentle hand squeezed his shoulder. He turned to the sound of the voice and looked into Jacksons sad eyes as he leant forward and rested his forehead against his without removing his hand from Youngjae’s shoulder, he stayed like that for a few seconds allowing him to see his pain reflected in the other mans eyes. Youngjae took a shaky breath and then gave him a small nod before separating from Jackson, he felt another small squeeze on his shoulder and then he was bathed in the glow of a huge Jackson smile and he asked ‘Ready? Our Ahgases are waiting for us!’ He made the bird sign with his hands and made it flutter in front of Youngjae’s face making him laugh before he copied the sign and their birds were in synchronised flight. They giggled together and Youngjae felt the tightness in his chest ease. He couldn’t survive this without Jackson, he always seemed to know when he had reached his emotional tolerance of the other men’s behaviour. The fan meeting would be tough, they would be touching, laughing and displaying to everyone their relationship and then he would have to relive it again as the fans reported and dissected it all over social media. But today, at least for today, he had Jackson who would deflect people’s attention away from the others and hopefully onto some madness he would plan and execute. ‘Ready?’ Jackson asked holding out his hand towards him and he smiled back at the man wrapped his short warm fingers around his own making him feel safe and suddenly strong.

Afterwards they sat in the anti-room waiting for the cars to collect them. Mark was trying to calm down Bambam and Yugyeom who were still buzzing on adrenaline, the meeting had been a huge success and they were still on a natural high. Youngjae sat with his head resting on Jacksons shoulder feeling the weariness creeping over him after the pressure of the last couple of hours. Jackson had been wonderful, manic as hell, his laughter ricocheting around the room, involving Youngjae in all his games and silliness. If he was honest he had enjoyed himself and had spent very little time watching the other two men interacting at the other end of the stage. There was one incident when he was leaning on the table with Mark talking to some of the fans present and JB had chased Jinyoung across the stage in front of them attempting to grab the back of his neck to make a point. Youngjae had felt himself freeze but Mark had suddenly grabbed his hand and made a funny comment to the Ahgases while calling to Bambam and Yugyeom to join them to play rock, paper, scissors. A very rowdy game had ensued until Mark, the eventual winner, had made Bambam card swipe an enraged Jackson. It had given him plenty of time to recover while Mark had stood in front of him blocking him from JB and Jinyoung’s view. 

The manager called them all as the cars had arrived and as people grabbed their bags he noticed the four men deep in conversation by the door, JB and Jinyoung were still huddled together looking at something on Jinyoung’s phone at the back of the room. ‘Hey Youngjae’ Jackson suddenly shouted from the door making him jump ‘We’re going for food, non-spicy of course, you coming?’ Four pairs of kind eyes looked at him from the doorway and despite his tiredness he nodded his agreement and walked towards the four men. As he reached them he was enveloped by Mark, Bambam and Yugyeom and dragged out the room. When he had safely left, Jackson stuck his head back inside and shouted, ‘We’re going for food, see you later!’ at the other two men and made his escape. When JB and Jinyoung looked up from their conversation the room was empty. JB frowned and looked at Jinyoung ‘Do we have another schedule now?’ Jinyoung shook his head as a frown creased his forehead ‘Did Suenie say they were going for food?’ he answered as he quickly grabbed his bag ‘maybe our driver knows where they have gone, and we can meet them?’ JB stood staring at the empty room trying to work out what had happened, where had the other members gone and had he missed something important. ‘Come on!’ Jinyoung grabbed his arm and started to drag him out of the room and JB snagged his bag as he passed through the door.

Their driver had no idea where the other men had gone and when he rang the other driver he couldn’t help either as he had dropped them at a central location for food and they had sent him away saying they would find their own way home. JB had tried to ring Youngjae as Jinyoung had tried Jackson but neither man had answered. They decided to just call it a day and asked the driver to drop them at their homes. The journey was undertaken in silence both men deep in thought, they dropped Jinyoung first and he waved goodbye vaguely as the car moved off to take JB home. As he wandered upstairs to his flat it gave him time to think about the fan meeting which had gone well but something was off, and he couldn’t work out what it was. Jack had been loud, but the fans loved that and the rock, paper, scissors game he had watched from the end of the stage had been funny and successful, but something wasn’t right, and he couldn’t find an answer. He realised he hadn’t been next to Jack the whole evening even for photos and frowned, unable to shake the feeling of ‘wrongness’.

JB had been home over an hour when his phone rang, he was lying on the sofa surrounded by happily fed cats, he grabbed it and grunted a greeting. ‘JB its me’ Jinyoung said ‘have you seen Bambam’s Instagram and twitter?’ JB groaned ‘Oh god what’s he done now?’ making Jinyoung chuckle ‘No, nothing like that, he’s put some really nice pictures on of the five of them at dinner together captioned ‘Friendship’ that’s all and I wondered if you’ve seen them?’ JB frowned and answered him slowly ‘No I haven’t, let me look and I will ring you back’ he had no idea how to look at the pictures while staying on the phone, so he hung up quickly. He sat up scattering annoyed cats and opened his twitter using the official GOT7 log in and saw the pictures immediately. They were being shared extensively by their Ahgase’s with comments about how happy and relaxed the five men looked. He stared at the photos, obviously taken by Bambam, and couldn’t help but smile back at their faces, they did look happy and relaxed, the fans were right, so why did he feel the acid churning in his guts at the pictures and was that why Jinyoung had rung him, did he feel the same?. He flipped over to his Instagram and saw the same pictures and responses but there were questions about the lack of Jinyoung and JB’s presence. He closed the app and rung Jinyoung back, he answered immediately ‘Hi, its me again’ he said, ‘I’ve looked at the photos and they are great….’ He didn’t know what to say next and there was a silence until Jinyoung eventually spoke ‘They are great, they look really happy, but………’ he sighed and JB felt the urge to fill the gap ‘They didn’t want us there?’ Jinyoung sighed again and said quietly ‘You felt it too?’ JB closed his eyes before speaking as if the darkness made it less real ‘I felt it but thought it was just me’ The connection was silent for a few seconds before Jinyoung spoke ‘Have we done something to upset them? I didn’t feel any vibes at the fan meeting did you?’ JB kept his eyes shut reluctant to admit this was touching on a huge chasm of fears, 7 or nothing they had always said and yet something was seriously off centre here or was he just being jealous? Him and Jinyoung often wandered off or left before the others and went and ate together and the members never commented on their behaviour. He tried to think over the fan meet while listening to Jinyoung’s gentle breathing, he knew him well enough to let him think and process it through. He eventually spoke ‘To be honest Jinyoungie I don’t remember a lot of the fan meet as far as the other 5 are concerned, I watched their rock, paper, scissors and it was very successful with the Ahgases but I’m not sure what else they did, do you remember?’ Jinyoung thought back over the couple of hours they had all been together but if he was honest he couldn’t remember anything either. ‘Well we are all together tomorrow for the dance practice so we can see if anything is said then’ JB hummed in agreement and said his goodbye quickly. He still hadn’t opened his eyes and not really knowing why it felt safer to stay that way.

The dinner was a success, Bambam and Yugyeom were flying high on adrenaline and even Mark was at his mellow smiling best. They had sandwiched Youngjae between Mark and Jackson and gave him no opportunity to brood about the fan meeting. Jackson and Yugi constantly bickered about the food and it would suddenly appear before his mouth from either of the hyungs and he would open up automatically. He couldn’t deny is was delicious and he felt safe and loved with the men. It was getting late when Mark reminded them all that they needed to get home as they had dance practice at 10am, Jackson wandered off and came back telling them he had payed the bill, they argued good heartedly but knew they wouldn’t be allowed to contribute once he had made his decision. Mark asked Yugi if he wanted to stay at his as it was nearer, and he quietly agreed while Bambam asked Jackson the same question, but he shook his head answering, ‘Not tonight Bam’ and he nodded ok. Jackson stood outside with Youngjae and suggested they share a cab which he readily agreed to as he hated travelling alone. The journey to his home was fast and they sat next to each other in silence both lost in their own thoughts as they stared out of their windows watching the lights flashing past. As the cab pulled up Youngjae suddenly turned to him grabbing his forearm ‘Jack, why don’t you stay here tonight, saves you the longer journey home and I’m sure Coco would be pleased to see you’ Jackson looked at him calmly, Youngjae liked him like this, he loved his episodes of kinetic madness but he was at his best when he was gently protective and Youngjae felt nothing could touch him or hurt him while he was with his hyung. ‘Yeah, sure’ he answered understanding the silent message and grabbed his bag to exit the cab with him while apologising to the driver.

They sat on the sofa with Coco sandwiched between them. Youngjae had been right and she had been very pleased to see Jackson even as he had jokingly called her ‘the murderer’. They sipped their drinks, two large glasses of water, and let the companionable silence wash over them. Jackson finished his drink and put his glass down on the table a little too loudly, flinching ‘You want to talk about it Jae or leave it be? He asked turning towards him. Coco licked his hand as he pulled his knee up towards his body so he could see Youngjae’s face clearly. He watched him frown and obviously consider his question before he turned towards him and spoke quietly ‘ I can talk to you, I know you understand but I don’t want to cause you hurt as well’ Jackson grabbed the hand that was picking at an invisible bit of fluff on his trousers ‘Jae, he doesn’t even know how I feel about him, he’s oblivious of my feelings. This comeback has been tough as they’ve been so close but as soon as we finish I’m going to China and that will give me time to build up my walls again’ Youngjae’s eyes shot up as he mentioned China and he asked in a small voice ‘How long this time Jack, how long will you be away for?’ Jackson smiled softly at him ‘For as long as I can to be honest, why don’t you come with, the Chinese Ahgases would love it, come do some shows with me, we’ll take Mark with us, go and visit Bam in Thailand as well’ Youngjae smiled and nodded at him ‘I’d like that’ he placed his hand properly into Jacksons linking their fingers ‘Bit of a mess isn’t it?’ he laughed bitterly, nobody would recognise his usual sunshine laugh from the sound that left him. Jackson shrugged ‘Only for us my friend, not for the others as they have no idea about the impact their relationship has on the rest of us’ and Youngjae nodded his agreement.


	2. Chapter 2

Mark had arrived first with the Maknaes with armfuls of coffee and choco milk. Yugi and Bambam were walking through the routine changes in front of the large mirror as Jackson and Youngjae arrived and the noise level immediately increased as they talked about the previous evening and social medias response to their photos. Youngjae teased Jackson about the photo catching his bad side and he lunged suddenly desperately trying to find his ticklish spot. Youngjae shrieked twisting away from him to make sure he didn’t get to the only spot that would reduce him to a sticky marshmallow mess. Jackson managed to get his arms around his waist and lifted him off the floor as Youngjae let out a high-pitched girly scream gripping Jacksons shoulders to balance himself. He spun him around shouting ‘apologise’ to Youngjae’s shrieks. Yugi and Bambam clapped their hands in time as they shouted ‘spin, spin, spin’ encouraging Jackson to spin him faster. 

Jinyoung and JB stood in the doorway watching the riotous chaos taking place in the rehearsal room, even Mark who was watching the four men in the centre of the room hadn’t noticed their quiet arrival. They stood rooted, smiling in response to Youngjae’s screams and Jacksons loud laughter. Jinyoung watched Jackson’s face as he was spinning Youngjae and his bright smile as he looked up at the other man and he felt a tightening in his chest he couldn’t identify. He coughed lightly into his hand trying to shift the feeling, but it made no difference. He wanted to walk into the room, like normal, but felt fixed in the doorway his feet refusing to move. He reached his hand out blindly to his side until he came in contact with JB’s oversized hoodie and grabbed a handful of the material as an anchor. The other man gave no reaction to the physical contact as he watched Youngjae being spun around by Jackson laughing and shrieking and looking so happy. He tried to recall the last time he had made him laugh like that and felt a wave of sadness when he realised he couldn’t.

Mark was the first to notice the two men frozen in the doorway and called to the others to quieten down. There were a couple more rotations before Jackson placed a dizzy Youngjae’s feet back on the floor, but he didn’t let go of him as they both tried to clear their heads, holding each other tight. They continued to giggle at each other as they gained their equilibrium without loosening their grip of each other’s arms. It took a while before they became aware of their audience in the doorway and they all became frozen staring at each other until Mark strolled up to the new arrivals offering them coffee which they accepted on auto pilot. Mark walked back towards the two men in the middle of the room who were no longer clinging onto each other and raised a sardonic eyebrow at Jackson before grabbing both Maknaes and dragging them over to the seating area. 

JB was the first to move and walked into the room smiling at Youngjae and Jackson, he reached out as he passed and gently held the back of Youngjae’s neck giving it the smallest squeeze on his way to where the three others waited, Jackson and Youngjae followed him until they were all grouped around the seating area. Youngjae chose to ignore the questioning look shot at him by the American rapper in response to JB’s touch. As they came to a stop Jackson felt his presence behind him before Jinyoung’s arms snaked over his shoulders until he was flush against his back, the fruity musky smell washed over him with the warmth from his body and Jinyoung’s hands came together resting against his chest. Jackson had to close his eyes for a second to get a grip of himself as his senses were overwhelmed with Jinyoung’s close presence. He had no control of his hands as they raised to cover the other mans and he heard the hum of approval in his ear at the contact. At the same time, he felt the softest brush of fingers against his hip bone on the opposite side of his body from where Jinyoung had rested his chin on his shoulder. He turned towards the touch and looked into Youngjae’s concerned eyes and allowed a smile to flicker at his lips in response to the worried look before the fingers touched him for a second again, he could feel the concern and reassurance even within the fleeting touch. He felt his eyes soften towards him and the concern left Youngjae’s glance as he broke the eye contact. JB was speaking so both men turned their attention to their leader as he explained their schedule for the next week. Multiple groans greeted the timetable set out by him and some good-natured bickering took place before it was all agreed and settled. Jinyoung kept hold of Jackson until JB told them all to warm up and then moved away from him to remove his jumper leaving the coldness to shiver down Jacksons back at the loss of the other man’s warmth. JB turned to Youngjae and asked him to work on his back, laying on the floor face down before he had even answered. Youngjae slowly bent down to the floor and stretched his leg over the body below him minimising any physical contact before settling down on his buttocks, he placed his hands on the lower curve of his back and spread his hands wide with his thumbs either side of the spine. He pushed gently using the correct amount of pressure just as JB’s physiotherapist had taught him. He heard the groan of appreciation and felt his face flush as his groin clenched in response to the noise. Jinyoung was sitting close by with Yugyeom stretching their legs into mirrored V shapes, Bambam supporting Yugyeom as he shrieked in discomfort due to the leg length differences. Youngjae turned his head slightly to behind where the two men were sitting on the floor and he could see Jackson and Mark going arm stretches but deep in conversation. He was surprised at Marks angry face as Jackson appeared to be placating him and eventually grabbed him into a quick hug. Mark made sudden eye contact with Youngjae as he was being squeezed by Jackson and he mouthed ‘Are you ok?’ at him. Youngjae gave him a huge sunshine filled smile in response just as JB lifted his head from the floor and turned to speak to him, he saw his smile being directed across the room and twisted around to see who the lucky person was. He frowned as he made eye contact with Mark and saw the smile on his face die away and for a second a flash of anger directed towards him. Youngjae started moving off his back as JB was twisting around asking ‘You ok hyung, did I do something wrong?’ JB sat up and went to turn around properly to speak to him when Jinyoung grabbed his arm and pulled him over towards the others telling him to come and stretch his legs and Youngjae was left kneeling on the floor his question unanswered. 

Youngjae looked at his hands on the floor in front of him and realised they were shaking, he quickly splayed out his fingers and pressed them flat against the floor taking a deep breath to calm himself as the familiar gentle calm hand touched his shoulder and he looked up into Jacksons twinkling eyes ‘Hey Otter, you want some water?’ he asked handing him a small bottle. ‘Thanks Strawberry’ he answered giggling taking the drink, Jackson offered his hand to help him up and Youngjae grabbed it as he stood. Youngjae found himself sandwiched between the four men again, standing like sentinels around him as Jinyoung pulled JB up from the leg stretches. JB turned to the men and felt it again, the feeling that something was off, there was nothing in their expressions to support this idea, no anger evident on Marks face now, Jackson and Yugi were smiling at him while Bambam necked a whole bottle of water. But something was wrong, he could feel it. He had heard Youngjae giggle earlier but now he couldn’t see his face clearly as he appeared surrounded by the others, no his brain corrected him, not surrounded but cushioned, it wasn’t aggressive at all but loving. Jinyoung moved around him to stand with the others and JB’s eyes narrowed as he watched Mark subtly move into the space between Jackson and Jinyoung keeping them apart. He then placed his arm along Jacksons shoulder leaning into his body, he watched Jackson absently wrap his arm around his waist in response. Jinyoung didn’t notice and it was done in such a low-key way that at any other time JB wouldn’t have given their actions a second thought, but he was sure Mark had deliberately placed himself between the two men. 

JB gave himself a mental shake and explained to the members the changes to their routines they were practising today, Bambam volunteered to put the music on and within minutes they were deep in rehearsal. JB realised he had become sensitised to Mark and Jacksons interactions and watched them more closely whenever they were within his eyesight. He was sure now they were communicating non-verbally, but he had no idea about what, but every time they passed each other by some form of connection took place. It was early afternoon when he called a halt and suggested they eat and then run through the compilations a couple of more times before calling it a day. He wandered over towards Youngjae to ask him if he wanted to go with him to grab food when he found his way blocked by Jackson and Mark, both were grinning at him asking if he wanted to go get food at the café they used to frequent as trainees, they were training in the old building today so it was a rare chance to revisit their old haunts. They were offering to pay, and he laughed with them and agreed. When he looked up again Youngjae had gone and so had Bambam and Yugyeom. When he asked the two other men where they had gone they both shook their heads stating they had no idea. JB asked Jinyoung if he wanted to go with them but he refused saying he had a script to read through. The actor was trying to catch Jacksons eye because if he was honest he wanted him to insist he go with them or offer to stay behind but the man grabbed his coat and left the room with Mark. JB offered to bring back food and Jinyoung thanked him before JB left to catch up with the others.

Jinyoung sat on the floor with the new script unopened in his hands thinking, something was wrong, he was sure. He had felt that milli-second when he had touched Jackson and his body had tensed. He had never done that before, he always melted into his touch. It had scared him; he had thought he was going to pull away from him and he wasn’t sure what he would have done in response. Suddenly the door banged open and the man he had been thinking about fell into the room. He laughed his shrill laugh at him and gasped ‘Sorry to disturb you but I think my wallet is still in here somewhere.’ Jinyoung got up from the floor and walked over to the seating area moving the jumpers and bags that were still thrown all over. He turned to answer Jackson to see him hovering in the doorway seeming reluctant to enter the room. The strange feeling in his chest was back and he raised one of his hands to rub small circles against his sternum trying to disperse the tightness ‘You can come in Suenie’ he said softly watching the other man closely, he saw the flicker of pain, almost a flinch, on his face as he called him Suenie and the feeling in his chest was definitely pain now. Jackson hesitated for a second before walking towards him ‘Is it there?’ he asked. Jinyoung turned back to the seating fighting the need to cry but not understanding why and picked up the scheduling paperwork JB had left there earlier. The wallet was laying underneath and he forced a smile as he turned to the other man ‘Here it is!’ he stretched out his arm towards him watching him hesitate before questioning ‘Suenie?’. The man seemed rooted to the spot so Jinyoung walked towards him with his arm still outstretched ‘Suenie, you ok?’ he asked in a quiet voice as he moved nearer. Jackson was transfixed, part of him wanted to run away while the other part wanted to walk towards him. Before he could make a decision Jinyoung was in front of him and holding out the wallet. As he stretched out to accept it Jinyoung grabbed his wrist with his other hand and pulled him up close to him, their chests touching. ‘Suenie’ he whispered as he wrapped his arms around his waist and laid his head on his shoulder and snuggled his face into the crease of his neck. His small voice whispered, ‘Why are you angry with me?’ he wanted to scream and cry when he felt how tense the body was in his arms and the arms didn’t automatically raise to return the hug. Jinyoung held his breath and it seemed like a million heartbeats later that Jackson slowly raised one arm to stroke the back of his head and Jinyoung couldn’t stop the small groan leaving his mouth at the contact. As the sound escaped Jackson pulled him tighter into the hug allowing Jinyoung to breath in the scent of him, after the rehearsal it was earthy and expensive and was a heady mix. His Suennie always smelt so good. He could feel some of the tension leaving the body he held in his arms when a shout echoed down the corridor ‘Jack, Jack! Are you coming?’ Marks voice rippled into the room and Jackson dropped his hand from stroking his hair and slowly stepped back from Jinyoung breaking the circle around his waist. ‘I have to go’ he said taking the wallet that Jinyoung was still clutching. He held onto it a second too long causing Jackson to look up suddenly and make eye contact, Jinyoung’s breath hitched as he looked into a storm, he could see pain and anger but there were other emotions too and then just as quickly Jackson dropped his head and turned to leave saying ‘See you after lunch’ and he was gone. Jinyoung dragged the breath into his lungs, his chest was on fire and he felt unable to stand as he sagged back down to floor wondering what storm he had just looked into and although he hadn’t got an answer to his question about the other man being angry Jacksons eyes appeared to say yes.


	3. Chapter 3

After lunch they worked on a compilation of some of their older hits. It was just the transitions that needed work and it took about an hour and everybody was getting tired. JB agreed to one more run through and if it was okay they would call it a day. The members took their places and the music started, much louder this time as it was a complete run-through. The transitions were going smoothly as it moved into Stop, Stop It and Jackson walked up to Jinyoung for their famous shirt grab with his eyes down and made no move to lift his head up. Nobody else was paying attention to the pair but Jinyoung felt a flare of anger at his obvious rejection and grabbed the front of Jacksons t-shirt harder than intended as he yanked him towards him. He felt Jackson flinch as Jinyoung’s nails scratched his chest through the material, but he couldn’t let go his anger was so sudden and intense. Their faces were centimetres apart and Jackson had no hat peak to hide behind. Jinyoung looked into his eyes and saw pain, lots and lots of pain, more than earlier, he was shocked and couldn’t let go of him, he was transfixed in the centre of Suenie’s storm. Suddenly everyone was complaining and the music abruptly stopped ‘Oh man’ Bambam whined ‘You missed the next transition guys, now we gotta do it all again’ Mark stomped past them both moaning ‘For fucks sake Jack get a grip ok!’ and dragged him away from Jinyoung who remained rooted to the spot. ‘Hey, you ok?’ a gentle voice asked him and he looked at JB ‘No’ he answered almost as a sob ‘Something is going on and I don’t think we are being included’ JB didn’t argue with him as he knew he was right and just nodded.

JB knew Youngjae was avoiding making eye contact with him and he definitely was making sure there was no accidental physical contact. Whenever they danced there would be quick smiles and fingers would touch suddenly. It had started pre debut when Youngjae was so worried about his dancing skills. JB had started doing it to reassure him and they had never stopped. But today he was making sure it couldn’t happen. His arms were tucked in tight with no chance of a drifting touch and he hadn’t looked at him once. He felt a flare of anger when rotating to his place at the back during a transition as he had seen Youngjae laugh at Mark when he missed his place and had to shuffle back suddenly. This is to do with me he thought but pushed the thought away as they transitioned into Stop, Stop It. He didn’t know what happened between Jinyoung and Jackson, but he saw Mark dragging Jackson away as Jinyoung stood rooted on the spot. When he approached him to ask him if he was ok he thought he was going to cry, and he said what JB had suspected himself ‘Something is going on and I don’t think we are being included’.

They finished the rehearsal after a successful run through. Everyone was carefully polite to each other with very little eye contact happening. The atmosphere was awful and JB couldn’t wait to call it a day and send everyone home. A team member came to the room as they were finishing and asked if Youngjae could be excused as there was a video call from the production team of Idol Radio. JB nodded his agreement and Youngjae grabbed his stuff and said a quiet goodbye, after he had left JB told everyone to go home and he would see them at 10am tomorrow for a fitting at the new building. Mark collected up the two Maknaes as they were going for bowling and hamburgers, they asked if any of the others wanted to join and JB decided to go with them, it may give him a chance to talk to Mark, his smile as JB said he would go seemed genuine leaving him even more confused. The two youngsters immediately started arguing about who would be teamed with who and the two hyung's shared a sympathetic grin. 

Jinyoung stood rooted on the spot as the others all left the room. Jackson was in the corner on his phone, speaking fast in Chinese. Jinyoung recognised certain words but not enough to follow the conversation. He knew he was saying deadline a lot. He eventually finished his call and was surprised by the empty room apart from Jinyoung. He reached for his jacket and bag keeping his eyes down and turned towards the door. ‘Suenie, please’ Jinyoung’s voice stopped him in his tracks ‘Please talk to me, please’ Jackson pulled in a ragged breath and slowly turned to face him closely guarding his emotions as he fought the passionate need to go to him. Jinyoung stood in the centre of the room looking lost ‘what have I done’ he whispered ‘You wont even look at me and you obviously don’t want me to touch you, please tell me Suenie’   
Jackson took a deep breath and pushed out the answer ‘It’s nothing, everything is fine, you must be tired, that’s all’ he stood fixed to the spot, unable to walk nearer but too scared to leave ‘Suenie please……..’ Jinyoung was happy to beg if it meant he could understand what was happening here, the pain in his chest was spreading and he felt lost. Jackson took a step towards him even though he didn’t want to, he had no control, he never had when it came to Jinyoung. When he was two steps away he saw the tear slide out and slowly trail down his cheek and his resolve broke as he took the last steps at a rush. Jinyoung threw himself at him as he started to move faster, they collided grabbing hold of each other’s bodies. Jackson didn’t know what possessed him, but he grabbed the other man’s face, tilted his head to one side and kissed him. An angry passionate kiss, their lips clashed, and Jackson growled against Jinyoung’s mouth. ‘Suenie’ Jinyoung whispered as he opened his mouth in response and Jackson angrily trust his tongue inside. He held Jinyoung tightly against him pushing a leg between his and ground against him. Jinyoung moaned loudly as he carded his hands through Jacksons hair. At first he had been stunned by the rappers behaviour but now he was kissing him back swirling his tongue around his and pushing back against his thrusting movements. He didn’t care that Jackson was angry with him as long as he was responding and holding him, he didn’t think about what they were doing only that Jackson had a tight hold of him and he needed this, needed him. Jackson was consumed by Jinyoung, how he felt, his smell, his taste and he was losing control. He broke the kiss but Jinyoung whimpered his disapproval and he immediately returned to his mouth biting at his beautiful lower lip and pulling another moan from him. He leaned back looking at his face, he was flushed, and his pupils were huge and feverish, a cold blast of reality hit him suddenly. What the hell was he doing? This was a really, really bad idea. He stepped back from him suddenly and Jinyoung swayed trying to regain his balance as Jackson backed away from him ‘Hell Jinyoung, I’m so sorry, forgive me’ and he was gone leaving Jinyoung to crumple down to the floor confused and scared for the second time that day.

The bowling was loud and goodhearted, Mark was teamed with Yugi and they were thrashing JB and Bambam who seemed more focussed on tormenting each other. They gave up scoring which was unusual for Mark who was always competitive. When their hunger drove them in search of burgers they decided to walk to the nearest place locally. Yugi and Bambam walked in front arguing about the newest music by an American band they liked and Mark and JB walked along in silence. JB had no idea how to bring up his suspicions without sounding paranoid and sighed deeply without realising. Mark chuckled and JB turned to look at him returning the smile as it was so genuine. Mark tilted his head to one side before speaking ‘Might be better if you just ask, it’s been festering a hole in your guts all evening. I know its why you came with us, you rarely do this mid comeback’ JB nodded in acknowledgement, stupid to think Mark wouldn’t know, their quiet watcher and thinker. ‘I feel stupid’ JB started and Mark snorted ‘I doubt that!’ JB grinned, ‘actually I do, I can’t shift this feeling that there’s something happening right in front of me and you are keeping it from me and Jinyoung’ The other man looked at him carefully before responding ‘Do you think we would keep something from you out of spite?’ he asked and JB shook his head before answering him carefully ‘No, and that’s why I don’t understand what’s happening. Its obvious you five all know whatever it is. I saw you today Mark, …………you deliberately went between Jackson and Jinyoung,………. I just don’t understand why. And Youngjae won’t even look at me!’ JB took a deep breath relieved that he had said his thoughts aloud.  
He waited patiently keeping his eye contact with Mark, he knew he couldn’t push him for an answer, but his silence didn’t lessen the anxiety he felt. What was so wrong that the other man couldn’t just give him a simple answer to placate him? Mark broke the eye contact looking down at his feet before answering ‘You aren’t going to like my answer JB, I’m sorry but its not my place to tell you what is happening. All I can say is you need to be more aware of what’s going on around you and the consequences of the things you do, especially publicly, people get hurt.’ JB frowned at his words before asking ‘Who’s hurt? You mean hurt by me?’ Mark shook his head in response ‘It’s not my place to say. We have another week of this comeback, just open your eyes’ he gently squeezed JB’s shoulder before ending with ‘It’s important JB’ and then he was shouting to the two young men in front as they had walked straight past the burger shop. 

He lay in bed much later trying to work out what Mark had spoken about. He went through every bickering argument they had had since coming back together for this comeback. Nothing hit him as important or anything out of the ordinary. He realised he had spent very little time with Youngjae and Jackson, but they had seemed very close this time around and he had a lot of work as leader with them being so close to their contract renewal. He had so many meetings and Jinyoung had taken a lot of the pressure off by helping out. But Marks words stayed with him, what was he missing that was important, something that was obviously very close to him. He tossed and turned in his bed unable to settle and thought of ringing Jinyoung to tell him what Mark had said but he suspected he had gone to dinner with Jackson as they had been the last two left in the rehearsal room when the rest had all left. He was happy if they had as Jinyoung had moaned about missing Jackson when he had been in China and wanted to spend some time with him. The thought of ringing Youngjae floated across his mind but it was late, and he wouldn’t appreciate being woken and he wasn’t sure it would be welcome after the way he had avoided him today. He closed his eyes and hoped for sleep.


	4. Chapter 4

The group of men sat around the room waiting to be called. The clothes for the next show were basic so it had only taken minutes for them all to change. The room was silent apart from Bambam and Yugi chatting quietly as they helped to sort the multiple ties on their outfits which nobody else appeared to have. JB kept glancing at the other men in the room who were all very busy looking busy. He had been shocked at how rough Jinyoung looked and had asked him if he was unwell, he mumbled something about being unable to sleep and then stuck his nose into a book. Jackson didn’t look much better and he studiously avoided any contact with Jinyoung staring at his phone unblinking which was so obvious that JB had made questioning eye contact with Mark who raised an eyebrow in response. JB felt like he was drowning in treacle and couldn’t even save himself. He heard Youngjae being called and watched him uncurl himself from the corner of the room where he had been sitting hugged into a ball with his eyes closed. JB stood in front of him deliberately determined to create an interaction. Youngjae placed his hand gently on JB’s upper arm and said ‘Excuse me hyung’ as he manoeuvred around him smiling softly and went into the room behind. JB wanted to shout and scream, there was nothing specifically wrong with the interaction, but it didn’t feel right either!

When Youngjae came back he was smiling and called Jackson as being needed next. He grabbed his bag, said a quick goodbye and scooted out of the room, JB rushed out after him and grabbed his upper arm ‘Where you going Jae?’ he asked. He felt the slight tension in his arm before he relaxed at his touch. ‘When did his arms get so big?’ JB thought as he felt the muscle flex under his fingers. Youngjae slowly raised his head, made eye contact with him and smiled ‘They said to go straight to our Practice room for a run through for this afternoon’ JB didn’t hear what he said because he had seen it in his eyes, for the tiniest second he had seen he was hurting. He had seen that look so many times when they had first debuted, when he was being criticised from all quarters about his singing, his dancing, his weight, it had been relentless at one time. Marks words from last night resurfaced in his head. Is this what they all knew? That somebody had hurt Youngjae, he felt a rush of anger that he had been hurt and guilt that he didn’t know and hadn’t been there for him. Youngjae gently pulled his arm from his grip saying ‘I’ll see you downstairs’ and he was gone. Jackson was leaving with Bambam as he returned into the room and he nodded in agreement when the younger man said they were going to the rehearsal room. He crashed down onto the chair as Jinyoung went into the dressing room and Yugi came out all smiles. As the door shut JB called to Yugi who wandered over to stand in front of his seat, looked down at JB but didn’t speak. ‘What do you know?’ JB asked bluntly watching Yugi’s face closely, he knew he could trust whatever reaction he saw. ‘About what Hyung?’ he answered blinking rapidly and JB was shocked to see a shutter come down over his face. The surprise and hurt must have shown as Yugi knelt down suddenly by his side and searched his face anxiously while trying to grab hold of his arm, the words rushed out of his mouth ‘Its not my place to say Hyung, please don’t ask me, I’m sure they will work it out’ JB felt even more confused now, who needed to work it out? What was Yugi talking about, he sighed deeply asking ‘With Youngjae?’ and Yugi looked surprised ‘What about Youngjae?’ The door opened suddenly and hit the wall with a bang ‘Sorry’ Jinyoung muttered as he walked over to grab his book and jacket. JB looked at him collecting his stuff and wondered if Yugi was talking about Jinyoung. Had they argued? Unlikely but they both seemed unhappy, Jinyoung could be bloody vicious if he was arguing with you and Youngjae had always avoided any fights with him even from their early days. Had Jackson got involved, was that why there was an atmosphere? What the bloody hell was going on, why hadn’t Jinyoung mentioned it when they had talked and why wasn’t anybody talking to him about it! 

JB was the last one to enter the rehearsal room and everyone was scattered around the room in their own personal bubble. He felt the frustration prickle under his skin again but called everyone for the run through. He made the decision that as soon as they could get this finished they could go and get a couple of hours rest before tonight’s show. The music pounded through the room and he lost himself in it deliberately ignoring everyone around him, his safe world cocooned him as he let the beat reverberate through his body. He was yanked out of that world by a sudden ‘What the fuck!’ from Mark and turned to see Jinyoung and Jackson standing a foot apart staring at each other, the tension crackled through the air. The other four men were standing frozen watching and JB turned to Mark. ‘What happened?’ JB shouted above the music and also turned to Yugi bellowing ‘turn the bloody track off!’ causing the young man to scuttle over to the music system. Jinyoung and Jackson were still facing each other breathing heavily when JB asked again ‘What happened?’ but nobody appeared happy to answer his question. He turned back to Mark, ‘You shouted so you obviously saw something, tell me!’ Mark turned first to Jackson who shook his head slightly in response but JB saw the movement ‘Back off Jackson’ he warned and stepped nearer to Mark, Mark broke his eye contact with Jackson and shrugged before answering ‘They screwed up the grab in Stop, Stop It. Jinyoung’s hand slipped and he pushed Jackson away’ Yugi made a dismissive snorting noise and Bambam said ‘Shoved more like’ quietly to Yugi. JB glared at them both before moving out front to be facing the six men. He took a deep breath before saying ‘Listen up, this has to stop. I don’t know what Jinyoung and Youngjae have argued about and how Jackson has got involved but this has to stop. You make your peace and you do it quick before the show this evening’. Six faces looked at him blankly and Youngjae uttered a small ‘what?’ from behind Mark where he had quietly remained since the dance had stopped. Jackson suddenly laughed out loud the sound full of scathing bitterness, he walked to the side to collect his bag and made for the door ‘You just think that JB, I’m out of here. See you later’ ‘Hey Yah!’ JB shouted ‘Get back here’ Jackson stopped at the door but turned to Jinyoung ignoring JB completely saying ‘I said I was sorry and I meant it’ he had turned away when Jinyoung responded in a small voice ‘But you walked away’ as Jackson left the room doing it again. 

The show went well, the pre-recording went smoothly with no issues with the Stop, Stop It transition, they all had their professional hats on, nobody discussed what had happened earlier in the day. The interviews were funny and JB spent the majority of the time cheering up Jinyoung, hugging him and making him laugh in front of the MC’s. They had an hour break before the fan meet and everyone rushed to shower, change and order food. Jinyoung and JB were in dressing room B with the two Maknaes who were demolishing a Macdonald’s. JB realised he hadn’t seen the three other men and wasn’t sure who had collected their food. He decided to go check on them, he knew they had been allocated room D and wandered down the corridor finding the room and entered without knocking to find Youngjae being held by Jackson with Mark nowhere in sight. They seemed oblivious to him as they stood close together with Jacksons arms holding Youngjae in a comforting circle, Youngjae was crying and Jackson didn’t look in a better state as he stared at a point on the far wall. JB stood frozen to the spot knowing he was intruding, he heard Youngjae whisper ‘Just smile and let it go, its easier that way, its hard to say anything else, so just smile’ and Jackson nodded slowly in agreement blinking rapidly and then hugged the other man to him tightly. JB quietly backed out of the room shutting the door without making a noise confused by what he had seen. Suddenly another emotion was churning in his guts burning like acid spreading pain through his chest it made breathing painful and he knew he had to get away from the room, away from what he had just seen, he turned and bumped into Mark meeting his watchful eyes ‘How long have you been there?’ JB asked ‘Long enough’ Mark answered focusing on his face, ‘You got it yet?’ he continued and JB frowned as Mark moved around him knocking loudly on the door before entering and closing it gently in JB’s face. He walked back to his room in a daze unable to unravel the different things he had seen and what they meant.

The fan meeting was noisy and riotous, JB was beginning to question his sanity as Mark, Jackson and Youngjae sang, danced and played madly in front of the Ahgases present, there was no evidence of the sad men he had seen earlier. They actually outshone the two youngsters and spent the majority of the time talking directly to the audience. JB noticed that whenever he had a conversation with Jinyoung that involved them laughing, hugging or holding hands the noise from the other end of the stage would intensify and the Ahgases attention would be drawn to the madness going on with the other men. The only time it got awkward was when it came to the Hi-Touch and the seating arrangement had been shuffled. JB found himself at the beginning and not in the middle, with Jinyoung next to him followed by Mark, the two Maknaes and then Youngjae and Jackson. When he queried the change with Mark he just shrugged his shoulders and pointed that the other end of the table was the same and turned to focus on Bambam and Yugi. 

At the end of the day JB was the last person to leave the stage after telling everyone to travel home safely, as he got back to the dressing room only Jinyoung was sitting waiting scrolling through his phone. JB raised his eyebrow in query and Jinyoung answered ‘They’ve gone. It’s a full day tomorrow so I told them to go, we can go in the second car’ JB nodded and put his arm around his back as they walked out together, Jinyoung placed his head onto JB’s shoulder for a second before saying ‘You up for going somewhere for food and to talk? I need your company’ and JB hugged him closer as he agreed.

They ended up in a Subway for no other reason than it was empty, and they could talk freely. They both got the 12-inch rolls and attacked them in silence initially. Eventually JB said ‘I feel like I’m going, mad, I keep feeling stuff and seeing things and then within minutes there’s no evidence that it ever happened. I saw Jackson hugging Youngjae before the fan meeting and they were crying, I swear they were, Youngjae definitely was, and then they walked out on the stage with us like nothing had happened. Bloody Mark keeps telling me to see something that’s happening in front of me, what’s happening in front of me Jinyoung?’ he sighed deeply rubbing his hands over his face in frustration. He looked across at Jinyoung who was staring at his food, he spoke quietly ‘Jackson and I fought, and then I was angry because he wouldn’t look at me during the Stop, Stop It transition. I missed him so much this break, and I thought I’d get to spend some time with him this comeback but he’s avoiding me. Then I pushed him too hard for a reaction and something happened, now it’s even worse’. JB frowned at his words, not really understanding but was more concerned by his defeated body language ‘So you didn’t fight with Youngjae, how did you push him too hard? It’s pretty hard to make Jackson do something he doesn’t want to’ Jinyoung shook his head in disagreement and said ‘you know that’s not true when it comes to any of us’ and JB reluctantly nodded in agreement. Jinyoung suddenly looked up and JB was shocked at the sadness in his eyes ‘I can’t get him to talk to me now and I really need him to. We’re running out of time, we only have tomorrow all together, the last two days we have separate schedules and then he’s going to China. I heard the others talking before they left today, they were discussing their plans. Youngjae has asked for a leave of absence from Idol Radio for two weeks. YoungK told me this morning that he is taking one as well and travelling. And then this morning Yugi told me he is going to go to Thailand with Bambam. I thought about this a lot. This comeback we’ve been caught up in the contract negotiations and the chaotic mess about the Japan fan membership we’ve hardly spoke with the others outside of the schedules that’s why we don’t know what’s going on or what their plans are. We know there’s something wrong, but we haven’t done anything to fix it’ JB tutted before answering ‘They aren’t sharing with us either’. ‘So, what do we do?’ Jinyoung asked and JB shook his head unsure what they could do to get the answers they needed.

JB lay in bed with the cats around him. He stared unblinking at the ceiling thinking about the day. Mostly he thought about Youngjae and his stomach churned with acid, it burned in his chest when he thought about the hug he had witnessed in the dressing room. He felt his fist clench the top of the blanket when he thought about the tight hold Jackson had around his waist as Youngjae cried on his shoulder. His temper flared at the unknown person who had hurt him and then the wave of guilt that he hadn’t protected him when he made a promise years ago that he always would. He rolled over disturbing the cats and grabbed his phone, it was late, but he needed to do something. He wrote the message and sent it without second guessing his actions.

‘Hi Jae. Did you get home ok? Have you eaten? 

Almost immediately afterwards he sent another message:

‘Hey Mark, you need to talk to me! People are getting hurt!’

The second message was sent, and his phone lit up immediately.

‘Hi Hyung. Yes, I’m fine. Bambam made me noodles before sending me home’

He felt a flash of jealousy at the thought of the other members eating after leaving him and Jinyoung, but he supposed they had done the same thing so had no right to these feelings. His phone flashed again:

‘Yah, don’t throw your orders at me. I know people are getting hurt, I’m dealing with the shit. Look at your own behaviour’ He sent a message straight back:

‘Just tell me….please Mark’

He also sent another message to Youngjae:

‘Why were you upset, what haven’t you told me?’

His phone remained silent for a few minutes and he felt his eyes beginning to close, the phone suddenly lit up twice. The first message was from Mark:

‘I cannot tell you things that aren’t mine to disclose. But you need to wake up and see what’s right in front of you before people run away and it hurts us all’ JB frowned at the message feeling a prickling of fear at the content as he knew people were already planning to run.

The second message from Youngjae read:

‘It’s alright now, I talked to Jackson and he helped me’ 

JB rubbed his hands over his face feeling exhausted, the emotional rollercoaster ride within a comeback was taking its toll. He took a few seconds to decide his response to Mark before writing:

‘Mark I don’t know what’s going on, but I care about all of us and this is splitting us apart’

Marks eyes had drifted shut when his phone vibrated again, he lifted if from the back of the body laying sprawled over his chest and down between his legs on the large black sofa. ‘Who you talking to?’ the sleepy voice asked as they shifted into a more comfortable position pulling the blanket over them both ‘It feels weird on my back every time it vibrates’. Mark giggled softly ‘Don’t settle down too much I don’t intend to sleep here all night’ The quiet whine that met his comment made him smile but he knew that they would be remaining here if that’s what the other person wished. The sleepy voice spoke again ‘Is it JB?’ and Mark frowned ‘Why do you think that?’ There was a sigh before he answered ‘He asked me today what was going on, I know I hurt him as I wouldn’t tell but its not my place to say he’s being an idiot’ Mark laughed and gently stroked the top of the young mans head as he wrote a message back to JB:

‘Then look at what YOU are doing, every day, just you!’

He sighed as he sent the message ‘This is stupid, you can’t tell him anything unless he’s ready to see. I haven’t even told him that we’re sharing a house now. I know I told him we would when the leases were up but he’s too wrapped up in his own stuff to realise it’s happened’ Yugyeom raised his head from his chest and looked at him ‘He still hasn’t realised?’ he asked and Mark shook his head saying ‘Neither has your demented mother!’ and Yugi chuckled in response before looking at Mark with sad eyes ‘Mother hasn’t really spoken to me this comeback, I’ve asked him a couple of times to come back with me for dinner so I could surprise him with the new house but he’s always been too busy with JB’ Mark dropped his phone onto the floor and wrapped his arms around the boy holding him tight as he spoke into the top of his head ‘It will get sorted I’m sure, they all care about each other but it’s just got tangled, now go back to sleep’ he gently kissed the top of the other man’s head and he snuggled back down onto Marks chest and relaxed closing his eyes.

JB was sprawled out fast asleep covered in cats when his phone lit up on the floor where it had fallen earlier, it flashed with the message from Youngjae:

‘Hyung, you probably think ‘he must be happy’ but you are wrong. I am lonely and I’m alone, I don’t want to show this side, so I’ve been hiding it’. 

It went unread and unanswered.


	5. Chapter 5

The day was a massive blur, they went from one schedule to another, smiling laughing and performing for the crews and Ahgases watching. They hardly interacted with each other, catching cat naps when travelling or having their make up done. Jinyoung stayed close to JB and avoided contact with any of the others feeling left out and angry. It was late afternoon when JB realised he hadn’t seen Youngjae apart from on stage. He looked around the dressing room and saw him curled up facing the wall with his head on Jacksons thigh. The rappers jacket was over his shoulders like protective armour with Jacksons hand lightly resting on his shoulder. He went to walk towards them but stopped at the look from the rapper, it wasn’t dismissive, but it wasn’t welcoming either, just wary and he knew he wasn’t wanted near them. He put his hand into his pocket to get his phone and realised he didn’t have it on him, he frowned and realised he hadn’t had it all day. He looked across the room to where Mark was sitting sandwiched between the two youngsters, a head against each shoulder as he quietly played on his phone. Both the young men had their eyes closed and he could tell from their slumped posture they were napping. He walked across and spoke quietly not to disturb the sleepers ‘You ok Mark?’ he asked, he could still feel Jacksons eyes burning into the back of his head. Mark put his phone down and looked up at JB with sad eyes, he smiled tightly and nodded a yes response before looking from side to side at the young men ‘They’re shattered, we’ve been at this since 4am’ JB nodded his agreement ‘I thought we would have a long enough break to go home and rest but they are pushing on with the pre-records now’ He stood there waiting not sure what else to say. Mark broke into the silence keeping his voice low ‘So you, Jinyoung, Bambam and Yugi are doing Knowing Brothers tomorrow and Me and Youngjae are doing the 3 radio shows, Jackson is doing the first and third show and the video calls in-between then the three of us are doing that new variety show early evening and that’s it finished unless we do Inkigayo, will you and Jinyoung sort out the goodbye Vlive to the Ahgases?’ he took a quick breath before adding ‘How quickly will we know if the last show is going ahead as we plan to get the first flight out to Beijing as soon as the schedule finishes?’ JB stood stunned as he tried to process his shock at Marks news, it was all planned out, they were leaving as soon as possible. He couldn’t stop himself asking ‘So no dinner together on the last day?’ but more importantly he needed to know ‘How many of you are going to Beijing?’ he could feel the thumping in his temples, the sadness in Marks eyes increased as he answered ‘Me Yugi and Youngjae are going with Jackson but Yugi is only staying a couple of days and then going over to be with Bam who’s going straight to Thailand, I’ve got to get back here to the house as Youngjae’s brother is looking after both houses and all the dogs but I think Jae is planning to stay for two weeks and do the whole tourist bit with Jackson’ JB frowned confused ‘Is Coco going with Milo?’ Mark sighed and said very quietly ‘No JB, Yugi and I have been sharing a house for the last month, Milo and Dal are together at our home, we live together’ They stayed perfectly still looking at each other not speaking, JB felt as if someone had punched a hole through his chest as he recalled Marks words about what was happening in front of him ‘You two are together?’ he asked as a whisper and Mark nodded slightly towards Yugi’s sleeping head before saying ‘do you have any idea how many times he’s tried to tell Jinyoung about our new home, so he could surprise him, but we’ve become invisible outside of the group, invisible to the two of you, all of us are’ Marks eyes filled with tears as he dropped his head breaking their eye contact. JB wanted to argue with him, say he was wrong, but he knew in his heart he was right. Mark looked up suddenly as their manager entered the room and said to JB ‘You’re wanted over by the door, its ok JB, we actually all know how busy you are so that’s why I look after these two and Jackson will look after Youngjae’. JB sucked in a sharp breath and wanted to say more, that it was his job to look after them all, but he knew how hollow that would sound in light of what Mark had just said. 

JB walked away to the doorway to talk to the man waiting there. A tight voice came from the other side of the room from the where Mark was sitting ‘He’s tried to ask me to come to your new house?’ the older man turned his head gently making sure not to disturb the two young men to where Jinyoung was tucked into a corner away from the others his book hanging loosely in his hand ‘Yes’ Mark answered, ‘He’s tried. You were the first one he wanted to visit. When we are together you’re his mum no matter how much we joke about it Jinyoung, he needs your approval’ Mark heard the groan as Jinyoung pulled his knees up close to his body and hid his face between them. Mark went to speak again when Jacksons voice suddenly cut over him ‘Enough Mark, ……that’s enough’ the American turned to where the two other men were sitting opposite each other and glared at Jackson before speaking in Chinese ‘You know there’s more, we’ve started now, there’s little point in stopping, just speak the truth’ Jackson held his eye contact and growled out his answer ‘No, and you have no right to decide what’s said about anyone else’ They glared at each other and then Mark looked away conceding in Korean ‘Fair enough, that’s your choice’. ‘What else?’ Jinyoung asked without raising his head. Mark glared at Jackson who answered in a softer tone ‘Nothing that’s going to be discussed here and now’. 

The pre-records were finished and JB told them all calmly that the Inkigayo wasn’t going ahead so this was their last time together this comeback. Yugi and Bambam were loud and excited trying to ignore the atmosphere within the dressing room. Staff members were packing up and making individual arrangements for the schedule tomorrow and saying goodbye to the members they wouldn’t see after today. The Team Wang stylists were loudly discussing their journey back to Beijing and telling Youngjae all the places they would take him to eat. An ashen faced Jinyoung was packing up his bag when Jackson approached him and asked for a minute of his time. He nodded and followed him into a smaller room littered with clothing and hangers. Jinyoung felt the dread flow throughout his body as he reluctantly looked up towards Jackson, a voice in his head screaming that this was the last time he would see him for months. The rapper had stayed by the door leaving a wide space between them. Jinyoung tasted the bitter rise of acid in his throat as he waited trying to keep his face frozen in a polite expression. Jackson took a deep breath and then spoke softly ‘I’ve thought about this and I think I should be honest about what happened. I’m flying to China tomorrow night and it will give me time to sort this out in myself before we all come back together’ Jinyoung could feel his hands shaking and curled his fingers into his palms until he could feel his nails cutting into the skin. ‘You’re going tomorrow?’ he whispered and dropped his eyes to the floor to hide the pain at the reality of it happening. Jackson stood looking at him as the ache in his chest spread but Mark was right he needed to tell Jinyoung what was going on. His elder had trapped him in the men’s room between two earlier recordings and had ended up shouting at him about the whole situation and the negative effect upon them all. Jackson had promised him he would be honest with Jinyoung before leaving so here he was trying to find the right words, he took a deep breath and asked in English ‘Is it ok to ask for a hug goodbye?’ Jinyoung looked up surprised ‘Is it easier to ask in another language?’ and Jackson nodded ‘Then yes you can hug me goodbye as it seems this is the only language where we can say how we feel about each other’ he answered in English. Jackson stepped forward awkwardly moving his arms apart, Jinyoung walked into them holding himself stiffly as the other man’s muscular arms wrapped around the singers waist. Jackson leant his head in by Jinyoung’s ear and he could feel his hot breath on his neck ‘I wanted to tell you that I wasn’t sorry for anything that happened in the rehearsal room, never will be, I’m sorry it hurt you but not that I kissed you’ he released him abruptly spinning away and walked back towards the door ‘see you in six months’ he muttered quickly when he suddenly heard a soft voice call him ‘Seunie’ and he turned his head back. Jinyoung was standing where he had released him ‘You’re not sorry?’ he asked watching him closely. Jackson shook his head ‘No, just very sorry I hurt you’ Jinyoung tipped his head to one side and a small smile appeared ‘Come here Seunie’ he asked. Jackson frowned as he took a small step forward asking ‘You going to hit me?’ and Jinyoung chuckled as he reached out to grab his hand ‘No I’m not going to hit you although I’m beginning to think that maybe I should’ He frowned at Jinyoung’s remark but took a sudden surprised intake of breath when the other man raised his other hand to cup his face gently ‘Seunie, you idiot, do it again’ he demanded and Jackson took a deep breath, if Jinyoung needed another apology then he would give it to him ‘I’m really sorry…….’ He found himself interrupted by the singer shouting ‘No! Oh god you’re so dense at times. Kiss me again not apologise!’ Jackson stood frozen to the spot ‘What?’ he whispered ‘Oh good grief’ Jinyoung spat out and closed the gap between them and kissed him. It was short and gentle and he backed away as Jackson remained frozen in place. ‘Seunie?’ Jinyoung asked stroking the side of his face again as a small smile slowly spread over his face, he reached out and pulled the beautiful man towards him by his waist ‘Park Jinyoung kiss me again’ he demanded as Jinyoung smiled at him and did as he was asked. 

It was at least 10 minutes later when the two men re-joined the others in the main room with their hands tightly held together. The first person they met was Mark who smiled widely at the pair ‘Thank god’ he mouthed at them both and was rewarded with 2 grins in return. Jinyoung released Jacksons hand with a squeeze to walk over to Yugi who was now leaning on Youngjae with his eyes closed ‘Yugi?’ he asked and the young man opened his eyes sluggishly and gave him a sloppy grim ‘Hi Mum, you ok?’ before his eyes fluttered shut ‘ Yugi?’ Jinyoung called again and Youngjae elbowed him gently ‘You up to showing me the new house before you go off travelling?’ Yugi opened his eyes again and smiled at him sweetly ‘I’d love to, you want to come now and stay tonight as we have a spare room’ Jinyoung smiled and nodded ‘Yes I’d love that’ Jackson watched as Mark, Yugi and Jinyoung grabbed their stuff, collected up Bambam with the promise of a lift home and said their goodbyes. Jinyoung turned back at the door to look for Jackson ‘Ring me later?’ he asked shyly and Jackson smiled and nodded saying in a husky voice ‘Message me when you’re able to talk’ Jinyoung grinned in response causing his famous smile lines to radiate from his happy eyes as he waved goodbye. 

Jackson looked at Youngjae as the room became quiet and only the two of them were left. ‘So?’ Youngjae prompted smiling happily ‘I take it you two talked?’ Jackson chuckled and shook his head ‘Not a lot of talking Otter!’ he answered while ruffling the other mans hair causing him to chuckle again ‘Oh’ was his only response as he blushed at Jacksons answer. Jackson grabbed his jacket and bag and watched Youngjae closely as he collected up his things, he asked ‘Jae, did he mention the message?’ when he was ready to leave. Youngjae shook his head slowly before answering ‘I should never have sent it, he doesn’t want to have those kind of conversations, so I’m just going to pretend it didn’t happen’ He looked up at the end of talking and made sad eye contact with Jackson before going on ‘Will come back to mine tonight Jack, stay with me and Coco?’ The rapper smiled widely and nodded his agreement ‘As long as you buy dinner!’ he laughed as he linked his arm into Youngjae’s and pulled him out of the room.  
It was a good hour later when JB returned to the deserted dressing room, he slowly collected his bits and then wandered down to the main offices hoping to get a lift home wondering if this was the end of his comeback with the other members.


	6. Chapter 6

Jinyoung leant against the kitchen island watching Mark with incredulous eyes, he was carefully slicing vegetables while talking with the two other men. The two small dogs had calmed down at last after going hysterical at Jinyoung’s arrival and had collapsed together onto the sofa to sleep. The singer knew he was watching Yugi with Mark closely but the changes in their Maknae seemed so obvious now he was in his own environment. He moved with confidence around the other man and made gentle physical contact with his arms or by touching his back whenever he passed by him. Mark had remained wary around Jinyoung at first but when he saw the happy acceptance of their situation he had warmed up and had treated him with the usual gentle affection. Yugi placed the cup of coffee in front of Jinyoung with a shy smile ‘We want to finish the studio when we get back from travelling and then we can do the recording here, it will give us more freedom’ he turned to Mark and wrapped an arm around his waist ‘If I can keep him away from the games long enough!’ Jinyoung watched the older man smile softly at Yugi before answering ‘I told you that we can do whatever you want and Dad will always come over and sort it for us while we are away if you want him to’ Yugi shook his head in response before grinning at Jinyoung and huffed his response to Marks comment ‘No, we will sort it out when we get back, I’m only going to stay with Bam while you are in China and then we meet back here’ Mark just nodded his agreement and continued slicing the vegetables into thin strips. Jinyoung watched him more closely intrigued by his calmness and the constant smile that flickered around his mouth, he seemed at peace. A phone rang in the lounge and Yugi excused himself to go answer it. Mark looked at the other man and asked quietly ‘So, you and Jackson?’ Jinyoung tipped his head to one side in answer waiting for him to continue ‘Don’t hurt him Jinyoung, he’s kept everything to himself for a long time, don’t start anything if you aren’t serious, if you’re not just let him run home to China with us’ Jinyoung took a deep breath before commenting ‘Why do I feel there’s an ‘and’ in there as well Mark’ He saw the tension return to the older mans body as he put the knife down placing his hands on the unit leaning forward looking Jinyoung in the eye, all traces of the smile had vanished ‘That’s because there is Jinyoung, you know there bloody is. If you care about him you need to think about….’ Mark suddenly stopped and swore angrily. He spun away from him to the sink unit quickly turning the taps and letting the water run over his hands.

Jinyoung walked around the end of the unit to stand beside of him placing a hand gently on his shoulder before speaking ‘Mark do me a huge favour and just explain this all to me, why do people shy away from telling me and JB? We know something is happening right in front of us but its like smoke that we can’t grasp’ Mark looked towards the lounge but could still hear Yugi’s low voice talking with someone. Jinyoung watched emotions flickering across his face as he obviously struggled with what he was being asked. He watched him make a decision and stand a little straighter before speaking, Jinyoung felt the relief flood over him that he was going to get some answers, ‘Some of these things aren’t mine to share but we are separating out and maybe some time apart isn’t such a bad idea. Did you really have no idea about Jacksons feelings?’ Jinyoung frowned before answering ‘I’ve always had feelings about him, I’ve felt unsettled this whole comeback because I couldn’t get close to him, couldn’t get him to touch me but did I realise what he felt? No, not until he kissed me and I wanted him to do it again’ Mark watched him closely and nodded at his answer, seeming relived, before he spoke again ‘Ok, I get that, I didn’t realise with Yugi until the day he lost his temper with me about treating him like a child, I was doing that to protect myself from my own feelings. The next question is more difficult, what do you think we see when you and JB are together?’ Jinyoung’s face creased into a deep frown, he was surprised by the question but Mark continued now seeming determined to drive a certain point home ‘What do you think Youngjae feels when he sees you with JB, laughing and touching, hanging off each other, why do you think we need to protect Youngjae, Jinyoung?’  
The silence in the kitchen was crippling as Mark watched the realisation cross his friends face, he watched it slowly change to shock and then sadness, deep sadness. Mark stepped forward and wrapped his arms around Jinyoung’s shoulders and pulled him into a hug. The taller man leant his head on his shoulder threading his arms around the smaller man’s waist making the hug tighter ‘How long Mark, how long have you all thought that was the relationship?’ he asked in a small voice as he buried his head into the shorter man’s shoulder. Mark looked up over the man in his arms to the tall person who brought him so much happiness, leaning against the door frame, still holding the phone in his hand, eyes full of tears. Mark waited for the young man to speak, he pushed himself away from the frame and walked into the kitchen speaking softly ‘Tell him Mark’ he said before coming up behind Jinyoung and completing the hug, wrapping him between the two men. 

‘For years’ Mark said ‘but especially painful in the last 2 years, each comeback has caused more hurt, Jack runs back to China when it gets overwhelming and hides in Team Wang but Youngjae can rarely escape it, it’s pushed in his face all the time’ Jinyoung shook his head in denial before answering in a quiet voice ‘But that’s not our relationship’ he said. Mark made a dismissive snorting noise ‘It bloody looks like it to us and the Ahgases’ ‘I never made the connection’ Jinyoung answered and slowly lifted his head from Marks shoulder and looked into Marks eyes ‘How have you all not hated us?’ he asked scared of the answer. Mark looked at him seriously with a steady gaze ‘Hate you for being too wrapped up in each other?’ he queried and Jinyoung nodded ‘Well to be honest you’ve both always done it, right from the beginning you’d go through stages when we were all shut out but it was always more balanced then but recently we all got lost’ Jinyoung groaned and released Mark from the hug before stepping back to scrub his hands over his face, Yugi still held him in a back hug, arms wrapped around his waist spreading comforting warmth. He turned within the arms to the younger man ‘And as for you, how long have I not been there for you?’ Yugi smiled his gentle smile shyly and answered without lessening the hug ‘Only this comeback, I wanted to talk to you about me and Mark and the house but you never had any time, you didn’t even threaten to kill me this time!’ Jinyoung snorted a laugh while hugging him back tightly, he whispered an emotional ‘sorry’ into his ear before breaking away from the hug rubbing his face again and turning back to Mark ‘So you love him?’ he asked and Mark matched his bold eye contact and nodded. Jinyoung stared him down before saying ‘You hurt him I will kill you’. There was a moments silence before Mark giggled loudly and turned back to his vegetables smiling broadly as he answered ‘Yeah, yeah, yeah’. 

JB opened the door to his flat to be met by a group of hungry cats stating their annoyance at his lateness. He turned on lights as he moved about and looked on all available surfaces for his missing phone. As he entered the kitchen the cats increased the volume of their displeasure and he quickly open cans of food for them before leaving them to their supper still unable to locate the phone. 

He felt agitated with no specific reason or perhaps because of too many reasons. He threw himself down onto the sofa knowing he should really make his way to his bed, but it felt as if an angry creature was snapping and snarling inside him and he had no idea how to placate it. He needed Youngjae, he didn’t fully understand why but whenever he had felt like this he had always brought him calm and now it seemed elusive. He started to rerun the day, the way the other man had seemed like a ghost, constantly disappearing before him and then that look from Jackson in the changing room, what the hell had that meant? He groaned as the snarling creature inside him snapped even more making his whole body feel tight and explosive. He suddenly heard the buzzing from his phone when a message is delivered and rolled onto the floor looking under the sofa to see the lit-up device. He grabbed it and rolled back onto the sofa stretching out making his joints pop in a vain attempt to ease his internal pressure. He had multiple messages and skimmed through the names deciding on their importance. He stopped at the top of the list when he saw Youngjae’s name from late the previous night. He stared at the name feeling a spike in anxiety, this was important! He wasn’t sure how or why he knew that, but he sat up abruptly throwing his legs over the side of the sofa not breaking his stare at the screen. He made himself breath out as he had been holding his breath as he pressed the message. The words burned into his eyes as he read them unable to control the moan at what he was seeing. He hadn’t answered this message, probably the most important thing he had ever sent him, JB wanted to scream and shout in frustration. He needed to speak to him, to explain that he hadn’t ignored the message, had to explain about his phone being under the sofa. He pressed the call button and heard it ring. 

Jackson sat at the end of Youngjae’s sofa staring at the wall, the other man had fallen asleep at last laying out by the side of him with his head resting on Jacksons thigh. His hand continued to absently stroke the top of Youngjae’s head hoping it would lull him into a deeper sleep. Coco was curled up by his side, it had taken just as long to settle her after her Dad had cried for so long. Jackson had nearly rung Mark asking him to come and get the dog and to help him cope with the singers tears, but he didn’t want to ruin his friends evening at the new house. He let his head drop back onto the sofa cushion behind him and looked at the ceiling unblinking, thank god they were going to China tomorrow as this was becoming impossible to manage. He realised that within his conversation with Jinyoung he hadn’t even clarified what the other mans relationship was with JB, he had just been so euphoric that he wanted to kiss him he had thrown all logic out and just grabbed hold of him. He didn’t think he could cope with Youngjae crying like that again, it had felt like someone had punched a hole through his chest, he had kept apologising and that had only increased Jacksons pain. The final straw was him calling him Suenie as he cried, he never used that name, and he had just hugged him feeling powerless. He pulled the blanket from the back of the sofa over Youngjae and then stretched his legs out in front of him before closing his eyes. They just needed to get out of Korea and go to China and put some space between them all, he was pretty sure his Mum would help look after Youngjae and spoil him, and give him some space from everything that was happening here. He wasn’t so worried about himself he had run away from the relationship so many times although this was the first time Jinyoung had done anything to indicate he reciprocated those feelings, but he couldn’t get into a 3-way relationship with JB. He felt his eyes drift shut as his brain went into freefall and he remembered the way Jinyoung had kissed him.

The buzzing pulled him out of his mind wandering. The vibrations were under his hand that was resting on Youngjae’s hip. He could see his phone sticking out of his back pocket and grabbed it quickly before it woke the exhausted man. He didn’t pay any attention to the name displayed on the screen and answered it with a quiet hello. There was a moments hesitation before he heard JB’s voice ‘Jack, is that you?’ he asked obviously confused ‘Hmmm’ Jackson answered keeping his voice low and waited for JB to speak again ‘Is Youngjae there, can I speak to him?’ Jackson looked at the sleeping man and gently stroked his hair again before answering the question ‘Yes he’s here but I’m afraid he can’t talk to you JB’ He heard the other mans frustrated sharp intake of breath at his answer, he could picture his face as he responded ‘I need to talk to him Jack, just give him the phone ok’ Jackson kept looking at the sleeping man, remembering the tears earlier and made a decision hoping Youngjae would understand, he spoke abruptly but kept his voice soft ‘No JB I’m not letting you speak to him or see him if I can help it, he’s going to China with me for 2 weeks and you need to stay the hell away from him, don’t you think you’ve done enough damage’ he heard JB’s breathing changed and waited for the predictable explosion, he was surprised when it didn’t happen and the mans voice quietly asked ‘I’ve done damage to him. What have I done Suenie?’ Jackson flinched at the use of his other name, it held so much power when the other members used it but he felt his temper flaring ‘For gods sake Jaebeom’ he hissed ‘You’re not stupid, why do you think he’s hurt? Have you spent any time with him to know – oh no sorry that would mean choosing him over Jinyoung’ Jackson stopped aware that he had said too much and his anger and frustration at his own mess was driving his answers. The silence was deafening as he listened to JB’s laboured breathing before he answered ‘You have no right Jack to…..’ but Jackson cut him off ‘Actually I have every right, I’m the one who has sat here with him and hugged him while he cried so I have every damn right to protect him as you stopped doing that months ago!’ Jackson took a deep breath and realised he was speaking to nobody as the call had been terminated. He looked down at Youngjae who was still sleeping and hoped he would forgive him.


	7. Chapter 7

The banging on the door woke Jackson from a bizarre vivid dream, he felt Youngjae stir next to him fitfully, but he remained asleep. He was still sprawled out on the sofa with his head in his lap, Jackson pulled himself up into a more sitting position and felt the complaints from his spine. Too old and knackered to be sleeping sitting up on the sofa he thought. The banging continued as he checked his phone for the time and winced when it flashed as 02.10am. Coco sat up and jumped down from the sofa trotting from the room towards the front door her little tail wagging. Jackson felt the dread spread in his chest at her behaviour, there were only 2 people that could be at the door and would get that response from the little dog and he knew one of them was tucked up in bed at his new home. He could guess who was at Youngjae’s front door and this wasn’t going to be pleasant. He slowly slid from under Youngjae’s head and replaced his body with a pillow. The sleeping man mumbled but remained unaware as Jackson left the room quietly closing the door. He stood with Coco staring at the front door as another round of knocking started, he knew he would have to answer the door soon before the neighbours started complaining. He took a deep breath and muttered to the little dog ‘Stand by Coco this is going to get messy’ before opening the front door.

Jinyoung felt happy, happy and calm as he sat with Mark, Yugi and the two dogs. Their peaceful private relationship had eased through him as the evening had progressed bringing him peace and now he knew he was falling asleep. Yugi gently touched his shoulder when his head had nodded for the third time and smiled as he forced his eyes open to look up at him ‘Come on Mum I will show you your room’ he giggled as he offered a helping hand pulling Jinyoung up from his seat. Yugi showed him the bathroom as they passed by the door and then pushed open the bedroom door turning on the light ‘Sleep well, I’ll call you in the morning and we can all leave at the same time. Don’t worry if you hear me shouting first thing but getting Mark up is a bit of a task some mornings. We’re in the room at the end of the hall if you need us.’ Jinyoung smiled softly in response looking at the other man’s glowing happiness and closing the door quietly after nodding goodnight. He laid his exhausted body onto the bed and his last thought was he should really undress and message Jackson.

The door was pushed opened out of his hand slamming against the opposite wall as soon as he released the catch and Jackson knew this was going to be bad. The bigger man tried to physically push past him, but Jackson wasn’t having that and tensed against the force. Their leader growled at him ‘Where is he Jack?’ trying again to push him out of the way again, grabbing Jacksons shirt trying to spin him away from the inner door to the other room so he could enter. Jackson bent his knees slightly centering himself and resisted the spin, it been a while since he had tussled with JB. The whole thing had a surreal element to it as Coco jumped around JB’s legs excitedly, happy to see him. JB’s hands bit into Jacksons shoulders as he braced against him, causing him to flinch in pain as JB snarled ‘You can’t stop me seeing him Jack, you can’t!’ he pushed against his body again driving him backwards towards the other room. Jackson placed his hands against their leaders chest and shoved him back, hard. The painful grip on his shoulder released and JB staggered away towards the front door which was still wide open. The two men stood glaring at each other breathing heavily as Jackson looked at the man he loved and respected and felt his heart clench but Youngjae’s pain had caused more emotional chaos for him than JB’s distress and he was determined to protect him. JB suddenly pointed at the other man ‘You!, You have no right to keep him from me, I need to explain to him, you don’t understand Jack, get out of the damn way!’ He started forwards again and Jackson threw out his hand palm towards the man raising his voice slightly. ‘Please don’t even try, I will stop you. You’ve hurt him enough, just let him leave with us, by the time we get back everything will have calmed down’ JB stared at him as he walked up to the open palm until the outstretched hand was splayed onto his chest, he searched Jacksons face before speaking his voice taking on a desperate edge ‘I know I hurt him Jack, if I just explain about the text message and why I didn’t answer everything will be ok’ Jackson stared at him with an incredulous look on his face ‘You think this is about a bloody text message, please don’t tell me you’re serious, you think this shitstorm is just about a message you didn’t answer. How can you be so oblivious of his feelings?’ Jackson watched the detached mask he knew so well slip over JB’s face and the knowledge he had pushed the man too far as his leader raised his fist, Jackson spoke quickly moving back slightly ‘What hyung? You want to hit me? That’s going to solve the problem of you stomping all over his feelings every bloody comeback. You want to be with Jinyoung, that’s fine but don’t expect him, or me for that matter, to stand by and watch it!’ Jackson knew he was breathing heavily and had said too much but felt his own anger and frustration bubbling up to the surface. The two men stood face to face and JB slowly dropped his fist looking confused as he spoke ‘Me with Jinyoung?’

Time stood quietly still as the two men faced off in the small hallway, JB taller and leaner while Jackson was shorter but more powerfully built, unalike but strongly bonded to each other, even Coco had stopped jumping around their legs and sat watching them. Neither man felt happy to break the eye contact as there was no aggression now only confusion when the door to the inner room slowly opened and a quiet voice spoke ‘If you’re coming in hyung please shut the front door before the neighbours complain about the noise you two are creating’ Jackson moved to one side to allow Youngjae to move into the centre of the room facing JB. His face was puffy from the crying earlier, but he looked calm. He gently squeezed Jacksons hand before he raised his eyes to face the other man. ‘What did you want JB?’ he asked still quietly calm keeping a tight grip of Jacksons hand. JB stepped forward reaching out with but stopped abruptly when Youngjae moved away from the intended touch, he sucked in a sharp breath before stepping forward again but kept his hands by his side ‘Jae please’ he asked softly but Youngjae moved further away. Jackson watched the two men and knew the situation couldn’t continue and they needed to talk, JB looked devastated at Youngjae’s rejection but Jackson could also feel the tremor in the hand gripping his tightly. He knew that Youngjae denying him would be painful as all he wanted was JB to hug him, he had sobbed about craving the other man’s touch for hours earlier. 

Jackson closed his eyes and took a deep steadying breath before processing what was happening, let’s assume that Jinyoung would never kiss him if he was involved with JB, and Jackson suddenly felt the warm light burst of happiness through his chest as he realised the truth of this statement, he would never kiss him if he was in another relationship as he was fiercely loyal, then that meant JB was just a complete idiot and wasn’t involved with Jinyoung and needed all the help he could get to sort out this mess. He looked at Youngjae and saw the unguarded longing in his eyes before he tipped his face down towards the floor breaking the searching exploration of JB’s face. Jackson let go of Youngjae’s hand and stepped between the two men clearing his throat ‘Can I suggest that ….’ And he leant forward gently and grabbed JB’s wrist ‘…that you two….’ He turned slightly and grabbed the wrist of the hand he had just abandoned ‘….go into the other room and sort this out!’ He pushed the two wrists together and watched as JB immediately spread his fingers between Youngjae’s and enveloped his hand within his. He was satisfied that his friend made no attempt to remove his hand from the grasp so he continued looking back and forward between the two men before focusing on Youngjae ‘We’ve waited a long time Otter and made some huge mistakes but your happiness is standing here in front of you so you need to sort this out’ he turned to JB and frowned before speaking ‘and you’ve hurt him repeatedly so now is your chance to fix that’ he waited for the sarcastic comment from the man and was surprised when the only response was a nod of agreement. 

They passed into the room and Youngjae pushed the door shut stopping and leaning back against it. JB felt the tug against their connected fingers and stopped, turning to face him. He raised his other hand and curled it around the singers neck feeling him tense almost immediately and he watched the closed expression come over his face as his Youngjae, the Youngjae he loved, disappear. ‘No, please’ he whispered as he moved nearer. He felt the tug away become more insistent against his hand, but he refused to release the fingers. ‘Jae, please let me explain’ he spoke softly as he moved closer to his tense body. Youngjae stared at him blankly, he looked like a stranger, JB started to feel fear creep through his body as the detached man stood looking at him, unreadable. Youngjae suddenly spoke maintaining the eye contact ‘I know you lost your phone Hyung, its okay. I shouldn’t have sent the message. I’m sorry you’ve come all this way as we have a full schedule tomorrow.’ 

JB felt a flash of anger and remembered the times as trainees Youngjae would never admit that JYP had hurt him with his cruel words, JB had discussed for hours with Jackson how they could get revenge on their CEO for the pain he had inflicted. He allowed the memories of that anger and frustration to flow through him pulling Youngjae closer until he was flush against his chest. He felt like shouting out loud in joy when he saw a flash of something he wanted in Youngjae’s eyes at their close proximity. He released their hands and wrapped his arm around his waist pulling him in tightly. ‘You listen to me Youngjae’ he started ‘I’m an insensitive moron most of the time, and half the time I have no idea what’s going on around me but you are the most important person in my life, you always have been, do you understand?’ He waited for a reaction hating the fact that Youngjae’s body remain rigid within his arms. He pushed his face into the curve of his neck breathing in deeply, the unique mix of aromas enveloped him bringing him calm and happiness. It was his Youngjae, memories deeply ingrained within him scattered around his mind as he felt the body in his arms relax slightly. Without consciously thinking his mouth opened and he flicked his tongue against the soft skin of Youngjae’s neck and was rewarded with a soft moan in response. He extended his exploration in response, tasting the skin which enhanced the sensory input he was receiving that was completely his Youngjae. He bit down gently into the delicate skin and was rewarded with a louder moan saying his name. The younger man was leaning into him and turned his face to the side offering more pale skin for him to taste and explore. JB wasn’t going to refuse and took the offer, carding his hand from the back of the singers neck into his silky dark hair gripping it tightly to hold him secure and close. He bit harder on the fleshy curve of his shoulder and Youngjae gasped raising stormy eyes to look at JB. ‘Please don’t do this if it means nothing’ he whispered, looking frightened and vulnerable. JB moved forward and gently placed his lips against the beautiful curved mouth in front of him, he spoke against them softly ‘This means everything Jae, I was just too stupid to realise’ Youngjae made a sound between a sob and a moan and JB was suddenly being kissed passionately, he staggered back a step making sure to keep hold of the other man and gasped at the onslaught. Youngjae was in control licking over his hyung's lips demanding entry and JB immediately capitulated moaning at the passionate behaviour furious with himself that he had nearly lost this. The younger man grabbed handfuls of his hair and tugged as he manoeuvred his leaders head into a position that allowed him to explore his mouth and lips fully. JB groaned loudly totally overwhelmed by Youngjae’s passion towards him. He broke away gasping for breath as Youngjae threw himself at him, JB caught him by his thighs as Youngjae wrapped himself around his body his legs locking behind his back. The younger man caught JB’s lower lip between his teeth and nibbled before letting go and burying his face into the crock of his neck ‘You better be making for the bedroom hyung’ he whispered before biting down onto his neck ‘We’ve finished our comeback pretty much so I can make as many marks as I like’ JB groaned his agreement.

Jackson sat on the floor with Coco on his lap and gently banged his head against the closed door behind him, he couldn’t hear clearly but he could hear enough to know that the problem was being resolved nicely. He looked down at the little dog who returned his gaze her little pink tongue hanging out the side of her mouth and run the options through his head. He absolutely was NOT going to open the door behind him, and he couldn’t just leave the little dog in the hallway. It took a millisecond for him to decide to take the dog to Marks as he could also see Jinyoung, he checked his phone and saw it was 03.20am. Oh well at least he wouldn’t piss Mark off as there was no way he would wake up and Yugi would forgive him anything especially if he told him he had come to see his mum!

A dishevelled Yugi opened the front door his eyes widened at the sight of Jackson with Coco in his arms ‘What the hell’ he mumbled accepted the dog from his outstretched arms. Jackson smiled as he answered, ‘Coco’s Mummy and Step Dad are working through some issues and need some ‘me’ time’ Yugi’s eyes widened further and a huge smile spread across his face ‘For real?’ he asked and Jackson nodded ‘Yep. And now I’d like to see your Mother if that’s ok?’ Yugi nodded pulling Jackson further inside the house and relocking the front door. ‘He’s in the room you used last week’ he replied and walked away holding Coco in his arms ‘Goodnight Jack, please don’t fight, we’re all going to look like shit today as it is with zero sleep’ he waved vaguely walking away giggling to himself as he made his way down the hallway back to his bedroom. Jackson walked quietly to the spare bedroom and gently opened the door. The little bit of light crept into the room in front of him and he saw Jinyoung curled up on his side fully dressed on the big double bed. He shut the door behind him quietly and used the light from the phone in his hand to make his way over to him. He smiled gently as he shrugged off his coat and shoes leaving them on the floor and laid onto the bed snuggling into his body and curving his arm around his waist. He felt a glow of happiness as a sleepy voice mumbled ‘Seunie what are you doing here’ the other body shuffled back tighter against the rappers body making full contact. He rested his face against the crook of Jinyoung’s neck and breathed in deeply before chuckling and asking, ‘How did you know it was me?’ ‘I’d know your smell and the feel of your arms anywhere Seunie’ the sleepy voice answered before asking, ‘Are you staying with me?’ he continued before trapping the arm around his body with is own. ‘Hmmm’ Jackson nestled in holding him tight ‘Is that ok?’ before realising the other man was already asleep wrapped in his arms. 

Nobody gave the seven young men a glance in the departure lounge the following evening as they searched for a table they could all fit around. Dressed in sloppy hoodies and track bottoms you would not associate them with the glamourous band that usually travelled internationally. Yugi and Bam eventually found a table with 5 chairs tucked in a quiet deserted corner and said they would scout round for more seats but stood with their mouths hanging open when JB sat down and pulled a giggling Youngjae onto his lap wrapping his arms tightly around him. Their power singer snuggled in tightly burrowing his face into their leaders neck. Mark giggled loudly at them as he pushed Yugi into a vacant chair and threw himself into his lap his arm hanging loosely around the young man’s shoulders, Bam sighed loudly before grabbing an empty chair for himself mumbling about public displays of affection and appropriate behaviour from his hyung's. Jackson looked at Jinyoung and waggled his eyebrows which was met with a deadpan ‘Don’t even think about it’ in response as he sat gracefully on the chair next to Bambam. Jackson laughed and threw himself down next to the other man after pulling the chair closer to him.

The atmosphere was light and emotional, the happiest they had been this comeback and now they were separating out for weeks if not months. Youngjae had his face buried into JB’s neck as the leader spoke to the others at the table ‘Ring me and Jinyoung when you arrive safely’ he turned and glared at Bambam ‘that includes you and give my respects to your mother’ Bambam raised his eyebrow at the comment about his mother but nodded his agreement. ‘We will come and collect you when you fly back’ he looked at Jinyoung who was now holding Jacksons hand tightly in his lap and he nodded his agreement. ‘Keep in touch with each other and us’ he continued pulling Youngjae even tighter into his lap and spoke softly to the side of his face ‘especially you Jae’ Youngjae raised his head and smiled raising his hand letting his fingers stroke the side of his face as he answered ‘of course I will, I’ll be back in two weeks’ and JB smiled at him gently oblivious of the smiling faces of the others present. ‘He’s a lot nicer like this’ Bambam commented gaining a glare from Jinyoung ‘What?’ he answered ‘You’re not my mum now. I’m going home to my real mum!’ but he smiled at him and it was returned. Jackson leant in close to Jinyoung speaking quietly as the others continued to tease JB and Youngjae ‘I will be gone for 10 weeks but as soon as I get home I will try and move the schedule around to create a gap in the middle so I can fly back here to see you, I’m sorry I’m leaving so soon.’ Jinyoung leant his head onto Jacksons shoulder before speaking ‘Its ok Seunie, I will be ok as I know you’ll be coming back, I was always scared before you wouldn’t return, ring or video call whenever you can. We’ve waited long enough so a couple of months won’t kill us’ he wrapped his arms around his torso and held him tight. The atmosphere changed subtlety as the men recognised they were parting again and this time it was even more bitter-sweet. They sat in silence, two couples holding each other tightly and the third couple parting slightly so that Jinyoung could throw an arm around Bambam to include him in the hug he was having with Jackson. The tanoy suddenly announced the flight to mainland China and more than one man present made a big deal of collecting up luggage and property before approaching the gate leaving JB, Jinyoung and Bambam sitting at the table already feeling the loss of the others. Jinyoung suddenly jumped up and said to no-one in particular ‘I’m going for coffee’ walking away scrubbing his hands over his face thinking to himself ‘Its only 10 weeks, we’ve done much longer in the past’ and tried to satisfy himself with that.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here it is, the end. I’ve actually delayed putting it on as I didn’t want to say goodbye to them all. It would have been so easy to just keep writing and writing this world in my mind but there are other stories shouting to be heard. 
> 
> Thank you for all your kind words and suggestions.
> 
> Keep streaming and collecting points, chamsins, hearts and votes – everything! 
> 
> See all you baby birds at the next comeback!

It had been 4 days, 4 whole days and Jinyoung sat opposite JB who was staring at the table between them. ‘Have you heard from them?’ Jinyoung asked as he picked at the bits on the table. ‘Hmmm’ JB answered without looking up ‘What does hmmm mean?’ Jinyoung snapped at him. ‘It means he’s having a lovely time; Jack’s mum is spoiling him rotten and he’s fine’ JB snarled back at him and asked his own question. ‘So, have you heard from any of them?’ Jinyoung nodded and answered more calmly than JB had before ‘Seunie is fine and happy at his Mum’s with Mark and Youngjae. Yugi has travelled onto Thailand and got there yesterday – I got messages from him and Bam’ he stopped for a minute before continuing ‘so why do I feel so pissed about the whole situation?’ JB bit out ‘Because they are there, and we are here’ Jinyoung scowled and answered, ‘It’s nothing new is it we separate out all the time’ JB barked out a bitter laugh ‘Bit different now isn’t it Junior!’ Jinyoung’s head snapped up and he glared at his best friend getting a grip of his flare of anger ‘You want to fight, is that it? Will it make you feel better?’ They glared at each other across the table until JB broke the eye contact lowering his head mumbling his apology ‘Sorry, I’m just not coping too well without him, he doesn’t usually go travelling alone unless its back home’ Both men sat staring into nothing until Jinyoung gave a deep sigh and spoke ‘I waited so long to get this right with Seunie and now it will be months before I see him, what if he changes his mind while he’s in China’ JB snorted dismissively ‘I find that very unlikely Park Gae’ Jinyoung glared at him trying to decide if he actually wanted to fight or he was frustrated because he couldn’t solve the issue and he always solved their issues. 

‘JB?’ he suddenly asked, ‘You still have right of entry to China?’ and JB looked up surprised as he answered ‘Yes we all still do, that’s why they are all off holidaying’ Jinyoung nodded before continuing ‘So there’s nothing stopping us jumping a plane?’ JB frowned before answering ‘You want to go away for a bit?’ he didn’t feel very enthusiastic at the idea and he would have to find a cat sitter which was always a bind. Jinyoung gave him an incredulous look and was fast losing his temper with the idiot sitting opposite him ‘No I want to go to bloody China, for god’s sake, we’re both miserable, we have no schedule and they are all where we want to be so let’s go there!’ For the first time since they had met up JB didn’t look as it his world was coming to an end, he sat watching Jinyoung closely as he thought through the practicalities asking, ‘How long do we go for?’ Jinyoung shrugged his shoulders starting to feel the prickle of adrenaline about the plan they were making ‘I say we just go and leave the return date open’ JB snorted ‘You’re nuts, what just rack up at Jacks parents and say Hi can we stay as well?’ Jinyoung shrugged his shoulders ‘Why not? If there’s no room we can go to a hotel. But they fitted us all in last time!’ JB frowned ‘And what about the company?’ Jinyoung made a dismissive shrug ‘What about them? We can message Div2 when we are getting on the plane’ JB smiled widely and barked out a laugh ‘What like ‘Hi guys we’re off to china as well. You know the boss will go nuts’ Jinyoung shrugged again ‘I could care less, you in or not?’ He had barely finished speaking before JB was responding ‘Hell yes!’

It took 24 hours, a whirlwind of Jinyoung’s sister finding a cat sitter for JB that he trusted and for her to agree to check up on their homes. They packed light and agreed they would buy anything they needed in China. They booked their own flights not involving anyone at the company. And they were now sitting in the departure lounge at Incheon. JB’s head suddenly shot up from him browsing on his phone panicking ‘Do you remember where the house is and how to get there from the airport, we can’t really get in a cab and ask for Wang Jia’er parents’ home!’ Jinyoung laughed and shook his head smiling widely ‘I messaged his brother last night, wanted to check this plan wouldn’t annoy his parents but he thought it was a great idea as Seunie has the blues and its worrying his parents. He told me what shuttle to get to the city, its terminates right by the house’ JB matched the smile on Jinyoung’s face his panic disappearing as the other man continued ‘he had spoken to his mum and she was worried as all three men are trying hard to have a good time but they obviously aren’t happy’ JB frowned asking ‘Mark too?’ and Jinyoung nodded before picking up his phone ‘So this is the last part of the plan’ and put the phone between them on speaker.  
‘Hi Mum’ the voice said ‘What’s wrong? Are you and JB ok?’ Jinyoung gave a small smile at JB before speaking ‘Is Bam with you?’ and heard rustling before another voice spoke ‘I’m here, what’s wrong? Are you both alright, do we need to come home?’ The two men sitting at the table made gentle eye contact with each other understanding the connection they all had from the two youngest immediate questions, before Jinyoung spoke again ‘No we are both fine. We’re at Incheon and we will be on the next flight to Beijing. I was wondering if there was any chance you could get a flight to meet us there, if your Mum doesn’t mind Bam?’ There was a moments silence before Yugi spoke ‘You sure you’re both ok?’ and JB answered ‘We’re fine we just don’t want to be here we want to be there’ the two men could hear the maknaes having a garbled conversation before another voice joined the conversation speaking English ‘JB dear, you want the babies to join you in China?’ JB understood enough to answer ‘Yes’ holding his breath. Bambam’s Mum spoke again immediately ‘Alright I will help them get tickets, why don’t you all come here for a couple of days on your way home, the family would love to see you all’ Jinyoung quickly translated the bits JB had missed and they both agreed to visit. Yugi spoke again ‘It’s just us again Bam’s Mum has gone to arrange flights, where are we all heading for in China?’ Jinyoung gave a quick run down of the plan and the excited noises from the two young men increased in volume as the plans were agreed. 

Jinyoung hung up the phone and smiled at JB who nodded his agreement at the plan they had agreed, it would only be hours and they would all be together.

The plan had been sound, but they hadn’t anticipated a freak storm over the coast that left them delayed for 10 hours sitting at the airport. Jinyoung had received a message from Bam letting him know that the two young men would be on a flight to Beijing in 3 hours. The two older men sat working out flight times and realised the youngsters would get to Beijing before them and their plan was unravelling a bit. The bickered about ringing Mark to warn him that they were on their way but after eventually agreeing it was the best idea as he could meet the two other travellers at the airport it was too late and they were being bundled into the plane at high speed. After they had found their seats the Flight attendant came to check they had stowed their bags and took a second look at them after exclaiming a startled ‘Oh’. JB smiled brightly at her and spoke softly ‘Please don’t say anything as we aren’t travelling officially’. She nodded graciously offering them help to disembark quickly on arrival which they both politely refused.

They were both grateful for the food and used the time to catch some quick sleep knowing they would be there within 2 hours. As the plane landed at Beijing Jinyoung felt the rush of adrenaline at being together again, he shot a quick message off to both the young men checking where they were and confirming their arrival. 

The official process was quick and painless, answering the multiple questions from the immigration staff that crowded around them, they mostly consisted of information about their next comeback and when would they perform in China. 

After smiling for photos, they grabbed their bags and wandered out into the arrival hall, dishevelled and exhausted. JB looked at Jinyoung blankly ‘So we go where for the shuttle?’ he asked but the other man was looking past his shoulder with a stunned look on his face that slowly turned into a smile which transformed his face turning his eyes into an explosion of laugh lines. A loud voice bellowed ‘Park Gae’ in the distance and JB spun round to locate the source. He saw the owner of the voice immediately waving wildly at his travelling companion but by the side of him stood the man he had travelled here to be with, eyes wide and sparking with a huge grin of welcome. JB stepped towards him returning the smile when the other man suddenly ran and launched himself at him and he had to rapidly grab his legs to steady himself before they both landed on the floor. JB laughed out loud as Youngjae wrapped his arms and legs around his leader and laughed loudly in happiness. ‘I can’t believe you came ‘he whispered into his neck as JB held him tight and watched a certain rapper sprint past him to lift and twirl his exhausted friend in wild circles while he made very uncharacteristic shrieks.   
And then suddenly they were seven again, everyone was hugging and laughing while talking over each other. After being hugged by everyone Jinyoung tried to get some lucidity about how they were all here to meet them, Mark was pushed forward as the spokesperson while still keeping a tight grip on Yugi’s hand and quietly explained that the young men had rung him when he had arrived and had seen that the flights from Incheon were delayed. So, they had all come to the airport to collect them all.

Jackson suddenly spoke ‘We need to get out of here as we are becoming a source of interest, we need to get to my parents house and then we can eat’ There was lots of nodding and collecting up of bags as they all moved towards the exit. ‘Will we all fit Seunie?’ Jinyoung asked as Jackson took his bags from him to carry ‘Yes Mum and Dad are going to see friends, so they are leaving the house to us all for a week. Not sure if we will fit when they get back but some of you will need to go back by then’ Jinyoung nodded itching to grab hold of the spare hand not holding his luggage but contented himself with throwing his arm across the rappers shoulder and burying his hand into his spikey hair at the base of his head. He smiled as he was rewarded with a purring noise from the other man. He looked in front where Mark was walking between the two travellers from Thailand, they were making him laugh and he smiled in response to Marks high pitched giggle. He could hear JB and Youngjae chatting behind him as they walked, and he felt the happiness and peace wash over him. They were together, 7 for 7, everything would be alright.


	9. Bonus Chapter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I just had to write what happened next............

He paced; he knew he was pacing but the agitation was eating him up. Youngjae had wandered off over 30 minutes ago when he had snapped at him for the hundredth time. He checked his phone again and sighed that only 10 minutes had passed. The plan had been perfect, everyone returning to Korea on the same day ready for their secret comeback. They had done as much as possible in noisy chaotic video calls around half the world but now they all needed to be in the same country as a minimum. But here he was at Incheon with only 2 members arriving today and 2 others delayed for who knows how long because of the virus. He felt the gentle hand on his shoulder and the cup of coffee pushed into his hand as Youngjae’s gentle voice spoke ‘Not long now hyung, the flight from Paris will get in first’ he saw his excitement as he mentioned Paris. JB had been away for over a month working with YSL and Jinyoung had been providing daily updates to him on Youngjae’s health and welfare. He frowned as he thought if Yugyeom didn’t hurry Mark was going to arrive from LA without his welcoming committee being complete. Jinyoung was suddenly jolted from his musings when Youngjae gave a small shriek ‘He’s landed hyung, he’s home’ Jinyoung reached out to grab his hand and could feel the tremor as Youngjae wrapped his fingers through his. With a sudden yank he found himself being dragged towards the arrivals gate as his phone rang and he struggled to answer as he was pulled through the crowds abandoning his coffee on a convenient table. Yugyeom’s voice shrieked into his ear ‘Hyung where are you? I’m by our coffee shop but you’re not here!’ Jinyoung breathlessly explained he was on route to international arrivals passing the large duty-free displays when a loud cry deafened him as Youngjae released his hand and threw himself at the weary man walking towards them with a trolley full of luggage. Jinyoung watched his oldest and closest friend bury his face into the neck of their power singer as he enveloped him in a hug and couldn’t stop the prickling of tears at their reunion. JB raised his head to smile gently at Jinyoung and nod and he returned his smile mouthing ‘welcome home.’ 

He was suddenly grabbed by their Maknae who arrived panting heavily ‘Is he here yet?’ he asked and Jinyoung looked up at the board before shaking his head ‘No not yet, we have at least another 20 minutes at least. Let’s go grab drinks for everyone as JB looks dead on his feet’ Their leader smiled wearily as they moved to a free table and Jinyoung grabbed Yugyeom insisting he come help him get drinks for the others. Looking back, he saw the two men sitting closely together holding each other’s hand tightly. Jinyoung caught Yugi staring and tapped him gently on the shoulder ‘What’s wrong?’ he asked. Yugi responded with a soft smile and answered ‘I was really worried he would come back and pretend it had never happened, you know how he overthinks everything and a month is a long time for him to ruin it, I couldn’t stand it if he hurt Youngjae again but look at him hyung’ Jinyoung looked over to the table again and watched Youngjae gently stroke his friends face as he was now resting his head on the singers shoulder with his eyes closed. Although tired his face had a small soft smile as he nuzzled into Youngjae’s hand. Jinyoung had to look away as he felt he was intruding into their intimacy and it made the ache in his chest bigger when he thought about Jackson still caught in China.

They sat quietly with their drinks. Jinyoung felt his agitation increasing again when his phone rang distracting him. He looked at the name flashing and had to stop himself crying out loud as he raised the phone to his ear and waited to hear his voice. ‘Jinyoungie it’s me. Have you got him, is he home?’ Jinyoung cleared the lump from his throat before speaking ‘Yes he’s home and Marks due in about 30 minutes, Yugi’s here to meet him’ He heard the happy giggle from the person he missed more and more each day as the raspy voice continued ‘Good, good, it will be me and Bam next’ there was a heavy silence before Jackson spoke again, his voice much lower and tentative ‘I really miss you baby.’ Jinyoung held himself together terrified he would break down in front of the others, ‘Then come home’ he snapped back feeling powerless and slightly irritated by the loved-up behaviour of the two members sitting opposite him, fully aware that he would have to endure round 2 when Mark arrived shortly. The low husky giggle from his phone pulled a soft smile from him as the rapper asked, ‘You missed me?’ Jinyoung tutted and JB looked up from Youngjae’s comfortable shoulder ‘What?’ he asked frowning but Jinyoung waved him away with his hand as he answered the question into his phone ‘You know I have; I tell you at every call now just finish your show and get home. I can even cope with you in quarantine if you’re in the same country’ He heard him chuckle again before answering ‘So is this a good time to tell you I’m booked on a flight tomorrow? Jinyoung gave a very fan girly shriek at this piece of news causing Yugi to jump next to him managing to splash his Choco milk onto the front of his jacket ‘Ohhh maaannn’ he whined as he quickly put the drinks down and started dabbing at his clothes with the serviettes from the table. His head shot up when a very familiar giggle was heard, total disbelief spread over his face when he looked over at his most important hyung standing near the table. Yugi shrieked at a decibel probably only heard by Dalkyum and Milo and scrambled over Jinyoung forgetting the chocolate milk dripping down his jacket as he threw himself at the smiling rapper. Mark staggered back under the onslaught of the taller man but held on tight around the dancers waist as Yugi shrieked his happiness to half the airport. Mark raised his hand and stroked Yugi’s head shushing him gently like an overexcited puppy as the taller man rested his head on the rappers shoulder and make gentle whimpering noises. 

Jinyoung’s attention was pulled back to his phone when he heard Jackson laughing ‘I take it Mark has arrived?’ he asked and Jinyoung smiled widely causing a cascade of creases to spread out from the corners of his eyes ‘Yes he’s home and our maknae is very happy, I think, but he’s kind of whining and crying at the moment’ He heard Jackson laugh again and closed his eyes at the tightness in his chest the sound caused. He could eventually speak again ‘You really coming home tomorrow Seunie?’ he asked hating the vulnerability he could hear in his own voice. Jackson voice dropped lower as he spoke gently to the singer ‘Hey, don’t sound so unsure, I know it has been months but I’m coming home to Korea because you’re there, that’s why its home’ This time Jinyoung couldn’t stop the tears spill out from under his eyelids as he listened to Jacksons ragged breathing in his ear ‘just come home’ he whispered back as he looked up to the four men watching him quietly. A lifetime ago he would have been angry and embarrassed at them seeing him cry about Seunie but their worried loving faces gave him something to cling onto. ‘He’s coming home, right?’ Yugi’s small high voice asked his fingers interlinking with Marks as he spoke, he was already nodding creating the answer he wanted to the question. The pain in Jinyoung’s chest dispersed slightly as he smiled back quickly wiping away the escaped tear with the back of his hand ‘He says he has a flight tomorrow’ he answered his voice not as whipped as he feared ‘So only Bam now?’ Yugi continued turning his frowning face to Mark who reached up to stroke his cheek with a delicate touch ‘Don’t worry Yugs, we will get your partner in crime home for you’

He was frozen to the spot as he made eye contact with him over the barrier, part of his brain was screaming at him to smile and move but he remained rooted to the spot as the tight knot in his chest completely unravelled for the first time in months. ‘He’s home’ a voice played on a loop in his head as the beautiful man took steps towards him. Jinyoung had been determined not to act as if he was living within ‘Love Actually’ but as the rapper rounded the corner he launched himself at him wrapping his arms around his neck as he burrowed his face into the crease of his neck inhaling the uniqueness that was Jackson Wang. The man in question dropped his very expensive executive case and grabbed the back of Jinyoung’s legs pulling him up onto his chest. The air exploded out of the singer as his wrapped himself around his VIP feeling the inner calmness ripple through his body. Jackson laughed through his mask, holding his precious person close and couldn’t resist the opportunity to grind himself against Jinyoung, the outraged gasp was worth the risk as a pair of dark eyes glared at him as the grip in his shoulders and neck changed to a tight grip on his hair. ‘Seunie’ he warned, almost a growl as his pupils enlarged in response to a more delicate targeted grind from the rapper. ‘Say my name again’ the rapper growled as he pulled Jinyoung tighter into his body ensuring their groins brushed against each other again. He was rewarded with a needy whine from the singer and Jackson leaned into his neck to speak quietly ‘I have 2 weeks in quarantine and then you are all mine. I’ve waited 4 months and now you are all mine’ Jinyoung knew he should be angry, should be demanding to be put down, to be released, but his body was screaming its satisfaction at the close contact and he tugged at Jacksons hair until their faces were millimetres apart ‘Seunie’ he moaned into the rappers face and watched his eyes turn into the darkest abyss. They stood frozen for seconds that seemed like hours until Jackson slowly let Jinyoung’s legs slide back down until he was standing again. Jackson wasn’t sure when he had last breathed and could feel his lungs screaming at him as he pulled in a deep breath ‘God you’re so beautiful’ he said as he hugged him close.

JB walked back from the kitchen holding the 2 drinks, Youngjae was standing by the huge window looking out over Seoul with all the room lights off, the city had managed to look beautiful for the occasion. He’d put music on while JB had been in the kitchen, he recognised their voices entwined with the others, old songs carrying a multitude of memories. The chords spilled over into the room and he heard Youngjae catch his breath as their leaders voice echoed around the room. JB put the drinks down and slowly walked up behind him sliding his arms around his waist moulding his body into his before resting his chin into his shoulder. ‘I never really listened to the truth of this song did I?’ JB asked quietly his breath ghosting across Youngjae’s cheek. The singer hummed softly before answering ‘its not that you never listened, you just weren’t aware’ JB felt his chest tighten at the answer. Youngjae turned his face towards him and smiled gently ‘but you’re listening now’ he turned his whole body, slotting against him perfectly as he began to slowly sway to the music as his breathy voice sang the words into the crease of JB’s neck. JB had never heard this voice from the other man before as the words from Reborn gently heated his neck, it was soft and soulful but full of love and belonged to only him, JB pulled him in tighter as the terrifying thought of the loss of this man consumed him suddenly. Youngjae shushed him gently stroking his hair as he tangled it between his fingers ‘I’m not going anywhere’ he said intuitively knowing the fear that had gripped the other man as he slowly kissed him.

‘Mark! Yugi shouted from the kitchen, he waited a few seconds and then called him again. He huffed as he walked down the hallway to the lounge and found him sprawled out on the sofa fast asleep. He giggled softly as he watched him breathing giving out little snores as he exhaled. At a rough guess he had been awake for 26 hours and was exhausted. Yugi moved to the side of the sofa and settled down on the floor near Marks chest and rested his head against his side. His face rose and fell gently with his hyungs breathing and Yugi felt the happiness wash over him as he finally accepted he was back in Korea, with him. 

Bambam frowned at the official as the conversation was repeated for the 5th time. ‘As I was explaining earlier as you are no longer employed by JYPE you do not get an automatic visa to enter the country and with no local representation I cannot see how this can be resolved’ Bam withdrew into himself counting to 100 in his head again as his brother argued with the pompous official controlling his urge to just leave the office. He was suddenly aware that the talking had stopped and opened his eyes to both men looking at him obviously waiting for a reply to a question. ‘I’m sorry can you repeat that again?’ he asked watching his brother shake his head slightly as the official repeated his query ‘Do you want to apply for a visitors visa?’ Bam shook his head replying bitterly ‘No, because that means I can’t work when I’m there’ and the official nodded his agreement saying, ‘Unfortunately no’. 

Bam sat alone at the small table with his iced coffee in front of him. He had promised to ring Jinyoung and Yugi and confirm his arrival details and now he was stuck at home with no way forward to get to Korea. His phone buzzed and he was surprised to see Jacks number ‘Hi Jack’ he muttered into the phone pulling it away from his ear slightly as his friend shouted, ‘Why didn’t you tell me there was an issue with the visa?’ Bam frowned before answering ‘How do you know?’ and heard him chuckle ‘I know everything…..and your brother rang me. I’m emailing you a contract to sign, get it back to me asap and you will be officially signed to Team Wang. Sublime will confirm you are coming to work with both companies, and you can travel in a couple of days.’ ‘Jack……’ Bam responded softly ‘You don’t need to do this’ He heard the steel thread in the rappers voice as he responded ‘7 or Nothing Bam, we’re all here waiting for you. Just get your arse to Korea so we are all back together and Yugi will stop moping around and Jinyoung will be happy as he will have both his kids home’ Bam heard his voice chance to teasing as he mentioned the other members and he closed his eyes as the thought of going home to them washed through him like warm sunshine. ‘Ok Jack’ he whispered, ‘I will be home soon’.


End file.
